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stxrvel · 3 years ago

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bittersweet feelings (1)

summary: you have to deal with the harsh truth after Bucky arrives from one of his missions.

pairing: bucky barnes x avenger!reader

warnings: nothing i think, just you know English is not my native language so sorry for any mistakes!

words: +2.5k

note: hi! I've been feeling physically unwell since I last posted and have been in bed, but today I was finally able to get a moment of calm and lucidity, so, enjoy and hope you like it!

also, i've been working on a series that I want to publish soon, but I don't know why I always find it difficult to do all that planning. anyway, I really hope I can bring it to you soon! thank u for all the support!

part 2

part 3

Admiring Bucky Barnes from afar has become too much of a challenge in recent days. Before, you were wrapped up in papers, essays, final exams and projects due, locking yourself in your room at a time or living in your university library, simply too busy to wander your eyes over the sprawling figure of Bucky strolling around the Complex. Ironically, he always spent more time there when you weren't there.

But now, completely free of academic responsibilities and banned from going on missions at Fury's whim, you had a lot more time to wander the halls of the Complex, especially in the gym where the man with the metal arm used to spend most of his time. Many times (if not all the time) you felt like a lousy attempt of a stalker, and you was almost 100% sure that he realised what you were doing but preferred not to say anything so as not to embarrass you. And that was much more embarrassing.

But did that stop you? Absolutely not.

He'd cut his hair a few days ago, and although you loved the way his hair looked on his shoulders and the way it blew in the wind every time he walked, as if he were a model on a bloody photo shoot, you shamelessly admitted that you had quickly grown to love his new style. Because, honestly, did something look bad on Bucky?

Your hands moved indiscreetly across the table, crumpling the paper between your fingers that you had previously been reading, as you watched the aforementioned man's shoulders shake after hearing Sam Wilson say something about Scott's card game. You moved your eyes scanning his entire face, trying to memorise the expression on his face as he smiled so openly, as he almost never did in public.

“Am I interrupting your crazy stalker moment?”

Tony's voice startled you, and you turned your head so sharply to look at something other than Bucky that a slight twinge of pain made its way from the back of your neck to your right shoulder. You grimaced and watched the millionaire sit down next to you on one of the black chairs that were spread out in the first floor cafeteria. Ahead of you, a large glass door separated you from one of the side exits of the Complex, where Bucky and Sam had stopped to talk and, surely at first, discuss the mission Bucky had just returned from.

“I'm not a crazy stalker,” you told him dismissively, but your nerves were eating you up inside. Even though you knew you weren't entirely discreet, you still weren't ready for someone to tell you that you were too obvious for him not to know anymore.

“Yeah, sure, whatever you say,” Tony commented sarcastically and you felt a quick pang of fear inside your chest, “I was just coming to tell you that Fury made the decision to send you to Milan with Steve the other week.”

Your gaze finally shifted away from Bucky's figure, closer and closer to where you stood, to Tony and you frowned at him in extreme confusion.

“What? So soon?”

“Isn't that what you wanted? To go back to the camp?”

“Well, yes, but I thought his tantrum was going to last much longer.”

Tony let out a laugh and proceeded to open the packet of peanuts in his pocket, “If he hears you say that, consider yourself fired, kiddo.”

“Then it's a relief that no one heard me say it,” you smiled innocently at Tony, who only gave you a tight-mouthed smile in return.

“It's just a recon mission. Steve thinks there's an empty HYDRA base you can investigate, and you're pretty nimble with that non-digitized document review stuff.”

“You mean I'm good at reading physical documents?”

“You know what I mean, eagle eyes. There's nothing you're missing.”

“Ow,” you croon with a smile, “Thanks for the compliment, Stark.”

“You're welcome. Now, don't go freaking out. Barnes is walking this way.”

He then stood up and planted himself in front of you, as your heart did a wild flip and you felt him pause for a second, before resuming his march at an unnatural pace. You didn't even know if it was possible for a heart to beat that fast. You felt sweat beading on your hands and started to breathe through your mouth as you felt the nervousness take over your whole body.

“What?” you exclaimed, staring at him, sitting uncomfortably in the chair across the table they had shared.

“I told you not to freak out, you're only going to make it worse.”

You narrowed your eyes at him with a frown. Next, you took about three deep breaths to try and calm your frantic heartbeat, before Sam's figure - and consequently Bucky's - appeared in your field of view to the side of Stark's body. The man gave you a look with an arched eyebrow, as if to ask you to behave yourself, which was an exaggeration.

That was an exaggeration. You spent a lot of time with Bucky! Even when you two were alone you didn't feel as nervous as you did at moments like this.

When your gazes met, you could barely return the smile he gave you before you turned your eyes to Sam, who had just spoken but you hadn't gotten to hear everything he'd said because your head was in the clouds.

“...and that you're going back to the camp with Steve. How long since you've been out? Almost four months? You must be anxious.”

You just nodded, looking at him through tight lips.

Tony rubbed his eyes in an exasperated gesture.

“I could ask Fury to let me tag along,” Bucky's voice reached your ears like a forbidden delicacy. It had been several days since you'd last heard it and it was like a gift from the gods, “Lest he bore you with his awkward silences.”

“We don't have awkward silences,” you grumbled quickly, not knowing exactly why you were getting defensive. Tony raised his eyebrows at you and you shrugged in place, “I mean, we talk about a lot of things.”

“Oh yeah?” Bucky's jocular tone didn't do much for your nerves and sanity, “Name a topic you've been talking about for more than three minutes.”

You pursed your lips and stared at his perfect face, uninjured by the mission, as you conjured up memories of your conversations with Steve. Your almost non-existent conversations.

Your cheeks flushed as you realised he was right, but you weren't going to let him win you over this time.

“One time, we talked all night about a movie.”

“If you're going to say you talked about Lord of the Rings, that doesn't count,” Sam spoke with a half smile on his face.

“Why not?” you grumbled quickly, watching the grimace in his face.

“He talks to everyone about those movies. It doesn't even feel like a conversation anymore, it's like a monologue.”

“Careful, Sam,” Tony spoke up after several seconds, “She likes those movies too.”

“Hey! They're good movies.”

“Good for a nap,” Sam let out a laugh.

You watched Bucky pursed his lips and looked down at the floor, holding back a chuckle.

“They're entertaining,” you muttered with a frown.

Sam pointed at you, his eyebrows arched and his corners raised in a playful grin.

“Well, that's it,” Bucky interrupted whatever Sam was going to say, “You know what they say, to each his own.”

“I'm with Barnes on this one,” Tony spoke up, resting one of his hands on Barnes' shoulder and giving it a little squeeze. Bucky watched his hand and then the millionaire's face with an arched eyebrow, but Tony quickly turned his attention away from Bucky to Sam, “Speaking of Steve, he asked me to tell you to look for him in the main room. He said something about a pending conversation.”

Tony put his arm around Sam's shoulders, leaning part of his body to lead him to walk with him out of the cafeteria. They promptly struck up a conversation on their way out of the cafeteria, and you felt your hands shake once you realized you were alone with Bucky after a couple of weeks of not being able to talk properly with him.

You turned your head away from where the two people who had accompanied you a few seconds before were leaving, hearing the creak of a chair being dragged in front of you. You watched Bucky move his body into a sitting position, settling his forearms on the table and his eyes fixed on yours. Settling into the chair, you gave him a tight-lipped, tense smile. Act normal.

“So the boss finally gave in,” the black-haired man said, his lips curling as he interlocked his hands.

You nodded your head slightly, “It was quicker than I thought. I thought he'd never let me back in the field.”

“And can you blame him? You sure scared the soul out of his body,” Bucky arched his eyebrows, and the mere memory of what happened gave you a feeling of irritability.

You grimaced, “Oh, it wasn't a big deal.”

“It wasn't a big deal? Honey, you threw yourself at those people all by yourself.”

You stared at him for a few seconds, like you did every time he called you names when you were alone. He never did it in public, and it was something you didn't try to think about very often.

“So what? This was all unnecessarily dramatic,” you tried to say in the most neutral tone of voice possible as you crossed your legs under the table.

“There were twenty men,” he said, as if that explained everything.

“Do you think me incapable, Barnes?” you arched an eyebrow, speaking with courage.

“No, of course not,” he quickly replied, his gaze softening, “But you disobeyed a direct order from Natasha and put your life at risk. You know how Fury is with you, he cares too much about you.”

You rolled your eyes, letting your back fall against the back of the chair, “But I'm not made of porcelain. I'm as good as Nat, she trained me herself!”

“But Fury didn't see her grow up.”

Well, he had a point and rightly so. You had grown up with the boss, who had practically adopted you, which was one of the reasons he used to be overprotective or refuse you to do some things because he thought it was for the best. And that fact had also helped you form fraternal bonds with all the Avengers until you were old enough and capable enough to be a part of them.

Well, you saw everyone as a nice family except Bucky. And that was a big problem.

You watched him through your eyelashes with an almost imperceptible pout.

Bucky gave you a beautiful smile, the kind that could light up an entire city, “Honey, I understand that it bothers you, but the position you put Fury in at the time, or everyone for that matter, made it hard for him not to make the decision he did. Maybe he overstepped, I'm not denying that, but he was scared.”

“There were other ways...” you started to renege again.

“And would you really have listened to him?” he inquired without wiping away his smile. It amazed you how lenient he could be with you, when with the rest of the world he was a hermit and sulky most of the time.

You sighed. Yep, you could be pretty stubborn when you put your mind to it.

“Well, the important thing is that he finally realised his mistake,” you blurted out with an amused grin. Bucky frowned and pointed the index finger of his metal arm at you.

“I think you missed the point of our little debate.”

“No, no... I understand, Bucky, I do. But Fury have to trust my skills a little more. I could against all of them! It was a spectacle.”

“But you're not always going to come out on top, sweetheart. At some point someone can catch you off guard, and that's what Fury's afraid of.”

“Well, it'll have to happen at some point. Unfortunately, I'm not invincible,” you agreed and admitted what he had said, because he was certainly right, with a tight-lipped smile.

You thought Bucky would be amused, or at least agree with you, but he merely bowed his head, frowned and tensed noticeably. You noticed that his expression suddenly hardened, and it frightened you that you had said something that would have angered him.

“What?” you asked fearfully.

He looked up from the table to look at you again, waking up. He gave you a smile, but a stiffer, harder and committed one. Your chest tightened, “It's not.... It's nothing. Just try to be careful next time, more cautious if necessary. You know, strategist.”

“Yeah, I know, I don't risk it if I don't think it's necessary.”

“That's my girl.”

You froze for a few seconds, just watching him, before your face heated up into an all too violent blush. He'd never said anything like that to you before... but you certainly didn't balk at the possibility that he might again.

“Thank you, Bucky,” you smiled shyly at him.

The sound of the cafeteria doors swinging open distracted the man in front of you, but you kept staring at his profile, gawking and surely with heart-shaped eyes. How was it possible that you liked him so much? Even though it had been a while since you last spoke, it seemed that your feelings for him had only grown three times his size.

Then, you heard it:

“Bucky!”

A woman's voice in the distance.

Confused, you turned your gaze in the direction of the voice, which came from the same place Bucky had been watching for several seconds. She was the one who had opened the doors so frantically, then. You frowned at her from a distance, unable to recognise her figure or features; it wasn't usually easy for you to forget the faces of people you knew, and you certainly didn't know this woman.

However, when you turned to ask Bucky, the half-smile on his face gave you the answer without words. Your chest tightened and you clenched your hands so as not to show the abrupt change of mood you had just gone through when he turned his face and fixed his eyes on yours. All without erasing that smile.

That smile he had on his face for her.

“I guess you'll have to go with Steve to schedule everything about the mission.”

You nodded, uncomfortably, not looking away.

“Fine. In the meantime, I'll go on my date,” he crooned, and the burning you felt intensified so much that it felt like you couldn't pass saliva without straining. But you smiled at him, your lips curving awkwardly and your face reluctant to show a feeling you didn't experience.

“Wow, I thought I'd never hear you say something like that.”

“Life is full of surprises, honey,” he said smiling as he stood up, “Do you want me to walk you to the living room?”

“No, don't worry. I'll be there in a minute,” you replied quickly. It was the first time since you had met him that you wanted him to leave you alone for once.

“All right. Good luck with the old man.”

“Thanks. Good luck with your- your- your date.”

You hated the way your voice betrayed you, but Bucky didn't seem to pay too much attention to it as he waved goodbye to you and started walking in the direction of the woman waiting for him outside the cafeteria doors. You felt your chest tighten as you sighed deeply and a couple of tears welled up in your eyes.

Damn it, at what point had all that happened?

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes #bucky x y/n #bucky x you #bucky fic #bucky fluff #bucky fanfic #bucky imagine #winter solider #james buchanan barnes #seb stan #sebastian stan #marvel #mcu #avengers #the avengers #tony stark #sam wilson

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xeulousluv · 3 years ago

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Almost

AN: Hello everyone, I am fairly new to posting on this app, so therefore I am still learning how to use it. Hehe :) Anyways, I hope you are having a great day!

Warning: Nothing really, maybe a little bit of angst?

Zayn and Y/n broke up and all he’s left with are the videos she took during their senior year of high school.

September 1st, 2010:

The camera was set up in her hand as she was slightly fixing her hair, a huge smile plastered on her makeup covered face. He always thought she looked better without makeup, but sometimes you couldn’t beat the insecurities.

“Here we are, the first day of senior year! How are we feeling, Zayn?”

Next to her stood himself, a much younger version of himself. Two years to be exact. He was almost unrecognizabel, with his usual high school attire adoring his body. A white tee-shirt, black skinny jeans, and not to mention his varsity football jacket hanging off of his shoulders. She looked lovingly at her boyfriend, her eyelashes beating against the softness of her rounded cheeks.

“I’m ready to get out of here, the last three years were the upmost worst years of my life.” Zayn spoke truthfully, he hadn’t expected to make it past the ninth grade, but with the help of Y/n, he managed to make it all the way to his graduating year. Y/n gave him an offended look before responding, “Hey! If it weren’t for these last three years, you would’ve never met me, let alone had the courage to talk to me. Am I really that bad?”

She laughed out while speaking, all so he knows that she is joking and would never accuse him of thinking such things. Though, he was already two steps ahead of her and was laughing along at her sad attempt of looking offended. “Of course not, baby. You are what kept me going.” With that, Zayn kissed her temple and she let out a small giggle before stopping the camera.

September 5th, 2010:

Random small talk was heard on the computer sitting in front of Zayn, before her face showed with a bright glow. She was so beautiful it almost hurt. She was laughing at something her friend Emery said, though it was completely inaudible, he just let the smile take over his face hearing her laugh again.

“I don’t exactly know why I turned this on, but hello! We successfully made it through the first week of school, and let me just say, it was not fun. The teachers still hate me.” Again, Y/n laughed towards the camera.

“I remember this one time last year when Mr. Lambert threw me out of class because I wouldn’t stop laughing. In my defence, he was talking about the safety of condoms and Zayn kept mocking him. That was a detention worth going to.” Zayn remembered that day clearly. He sat to the left of Y/n, Mr. Lambert’s first mistake, and would whisper in her ear how he would show her the proper way to wear a condom when they got to her house that night. To say he did end up showing her was an understatement.

The camera then turned to her friend before she continued on with what she was saying, “Anyways, Emery here, has informed me about this back to school party for seniors at Anthony Stilettos house. So, we are heading to the mall so we can get a nice looking outfit for tonight. I’ll see you guys later!” And with that the camera switched off.

He thought that was the end of the video, but when she popped back on his screen, he was pleasantly surprised. She wore a black dress that just reached her knees, the end of it rippled and flew each time she took a step. Her hair and makeup was done, and her shoes matched her dress, she really was the most beautiful person he has ever met.

Without saying anything, Y/n moved the camera to where the view was now on Emery. She wore a simple tight red dress that fit her like a glove, she was placing bobby pins in her hair before realising a camera was watching her every move. Emery turned away from the mirror Y/n had in her room, and started making random poses into the camera. The video finally ended with Y/n facing the camera back to herself while laughing at it.

October 7th, 2010:

It was homecoming. Their final homecoming, and of course, Zayn asked her to be his date. He didn’t go all out like the previous years, this particular year was asked right after they finished giving each other their all. They were bunched up together, all sweaty and breathless, and that is when Zayn asked her to go to homecoming with him. He thought it was gross because of their previous activities, but Y/n thought it was sweet, endearing even. It was personal and intimate, she wouldn’t have had it any other way. Plus, she was tired of all the attention that comes with getting asked to homecoming.

Her dress was a beautiful shade of baby yellow, Zayn wore his usual black suit but with a yellow tie and a yellow rose pinned to his coat pocket. The night couldn’t have been anymore magical.

“Z, are you ready to go? Emmy and Dallas are waiting in the car.” Her soft voice echoed through the speakers, she was worried about being late. But more so, excited about what the night had planned for the couple. Zayn was fixing his hair, like he does any other day, however today, he wanted to look his absolute best. “Just one more second, love. Gotta look perfect before leaving these four secured walls.”

Y/n rolled her eyes into the camera before another smile took over her face. It only got wider as he finally announced that he was ready.

“Baby, you look handsome! You don’t need all that hair gel, make one wrong move and we’re calling you Uncle Jesse.” Zayn scoffed, his hands finding their place on her hips, him being pressed up against her back. His chin resting on her shoulder, they looked so in love. They were so in love.

October 31st, 2010:

Fall was Y/n’s favorite season, meaning Halloween was by far her favorite holiday. She squealed into the camera when Zayn walked out in his Peter Pan costume. “Baby, you look so fucking adorable!” She cooed, though Zayn was having none of it. “Do we have to go to this party? Can’t we just stay in and watch scary movies, I promise I will protect you if you get too scared!”

He knew it was no use, Y/n had been going on and on about Anthony’s costume party for the past week, so when she started laughing, Zayn internally groaned. “Brave of you to assume I will get scared during a horror movie. How about we go for just an hour, then you and I can come back here and watch whatever movie you want?”

At that, his ears perked, he could go for an hour. That gives him all the more time alone with his love. “Hocus Pocus? That’s my favorite.”

“Yes baby, we can watch Hocus Pocus, do this for me, and I’m all yours for the rest of the night.” A grin was stretched across his face as she leaned up and gave a peck to his lips. Adoration shining brightly in her eyes as she looked up at him. “You are so lucky I love you, Y/n.”

“I love you, Zayn. More than you will ever know.”

December 31st, 2010:

“Hola, my favorite people! Happy New Years Eve, I hope you guys are having a good day. My family is having a little party to bring in the new year, even though you won’t be watching this until later when I decide to post it, I hope you guys have an amazing holiday. Be safe now. Bye!”

Christmas and New Year’s was hard for Y/n. She had major separation anxiety for everyone she grows close to, so not being able to see the people she loves for a whole two weeks was taking a toll on her. Not to mention, Zayn went back to Bradford for the holidays, so he wasn’t there to keep her calm. All she had was the emails and messages he would send her.

However, that night was different. She didn’t know what it was, but the air felt more intoxicating. There was something she was missing and the young girl couldn’t put her finger on it.

Emery got ahold of Y/n’s camera without her noticing, pressing the ‘record’ button and smiling.

“Hi, as many of you may know, my name is Emery White. Before questions start racing through your head about where Y/n is, she is currently in the kitchen talking to one of her neighbors, and she knows nothing about this so, shhh!” Emery held her index finger up to her mouth, even though she is talking to a camera.

“So, the time is now 11:58, meaning it is almost New Year’s and I got a message from a good friend of mine to get her camera and start recording. Oh wait, she’s coming over! Act normal!”

“Emmy? Why do you have my camera, wait no, when did you get my camera?” Emery turned her neck to look at Y/n, and smiled while looking at her friends confused face. “It’s almost midnight, I figured we could record the big moment for your journal thing.”

Y/n looked at her watch and sure enough, it was 12:59, and the people around her were counting down. By the time Y/n looked back at her friend, Emery had switched her position to behind the camera, her smile now stretching to her eyes. She gave a confused smile towards the camera before shaking her head.

10..

9..

8..

A tap was felt on Y/n’s shoulder making her turn around, not believing her eyes, she had to do a double take. There he was in all of his glory. Zayn stood in front of her with a bouquet of random flowers, her eyes widening in complete shock.

3..

2..

Before she could fully process his presence, Zayn had planted his lips against hers in what he would call, one of their best kisses. His arms went around her waist while hers were around his neck, keeping him as close as humanly possible. She was the first to pull away from the kiss, tears forming at the bottom of her eyes but never fell. Zayn pulled her back, this time her face went into his neck as he whispered out a small, “Happy New Years, baby.”

May 22nd, 2011:

Senior prom, a day Y/n has waited her entire life for. Getting all dolled up for one night of perfection sounded glorious. Unlike most people, her dress doesn’t reach the floor but goes a little ways past her knees. It was a light shade of green, she wasn’t usually one for the cliche pink and blue, and her stomach was laced over showing her belly button peircing. She felt on top of the world, the most gorgeous she has ever felt in her entire life.

Zayn was in a nude tuxedo, a lightish green tie tucked into the blazer. “It’s prom day, baby, how do you feel?” The now well-known camera placed in front of his face, though he paid no attention to it, but really the girl behind it. “Like I have the most beautiful girlfriend in the world. How did I get so lucky, hm?”

The blush was evident on her face, he could see it perfectly now even with the camera facing him and not herself. He could still see the light in her eyes. Looking back on it, he couldn’t imagine living his life without her, how could he let her go?

It wasn’t like they got in a fight or anything, Zayn and Y/n were going to different colleges and he didn’t want to do the whole long distance thing. He felt she deserved better than that. So even though the breakup was absolutely not a mutual agreement, Y/n somewhat understood and let him walk away.

“You’re such the charmer, Zayn. Always got me blushing for no good reason.”

“I would be a bad boyfriend if I didn’t.”

Now turning the camera to face both of them, Zayn placed a kiss on her lips before turning off the camera and letting their night go on as best as it could, for it would be one of the last good memories they have. Except at the time, neither of them knew the last time would actually be the last time.

June 4th, 2011:

“Hey everyone, I just want to start off by saying congratulations, we made it. Graduating today was the most amazing feelings, and I’m sure you all can agree with me. The past four years have really taught me a lot, I know I sound like the Mallory Barnes, our valedictorian that gave the speech today, but I’m serious, you all have been amazing. Teachers included.”

Y/n wasn’t in her usual attire. She was in a comfortable baggy hoodie, and that’s all you could see as her camera was propped on the desk in the corner of the room. Her hair was in a messy bun, no makeup, and her glasses were sat perfectly on her nose. What no one could notice was the slight puffiness to her eyes, the way they were red and tired. But Zayn noticed, however. When Y/n first uploaded this to her instagram, Zayn couldn’t bare to watch it, so seeing it now definitely brought back a feeling he tried too hard to push away.

“In the past four years I have learned about friendships, I learned about love, and I learned about heartbreak. I have got to say, high school brought me some really great friendships that I will cherish forever. I am finding it very difficult to say goodbye, but we are bound to go off and do bigger and better things. The future awaits for us.”

“I just want to thank you guys for the amazing memories, and I hope you guys make your dreams come true.” Y/n sighed into the camera, she was really bad at saying goodbye, though you would think it would be easier considering no one likes high school. However, Y/n loved every single second of it, maybe not the learning but the memories made.

“Now, I am going to get really sappy for a minute and say a massive thank you to the man who has loved me for the past four years. Zayn, I know we haven’t talked in a few weeks, and you’re probably not even watching this, but just know that I am so proud of you. I don’t know how I could not be. I really hope you make something wonderful of yourself. You were by far my favorite part of this journey. Thank you for sticking with me and for loving me. And even though we aren’t together anymore, I love you.”

“We almost had it all, didn’t we?”

AN: Yeah, I don't think I like this babahahah. Love the concept but someone out there could definitely write it better.

#zayn mailk #zayn x reader #zayn malik fanfic #zayn malik angst #angst fanfic

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firefly-in-darkness · 4 years ago

Text

Smooth

Pairing → Sam Wilson x Reader

Characters → Marvel

Summary → Y/N has to fight off the smile and laughter at Sam Wilson’s chat up lines throught their relationship but here are a few of their milestones.

Word Count → 3.7k

Prompt → Trope: 5 Things Plus 1 for @bonkywobble challenge - congrats on your follower milestone lovely!

SSB2021 Square Fill → Posted at the end of the story as it’s a spoiler // @star-spangled-bingo

Warnings → Fluff, sweet, tooth-rotting fluff. Cheesy chat up lines.

Betas → @daydream3r-xo // all mistakes are my own.

A/N → This is my first proper Sam Wilson fic - I have done one in the past but there was more platonic - so I hope you enjoy this story!

Firefly’s Masterlist

Sam Wilson couldn’t believe his luck, he’d signed up to the right gym, that’s for sure. There was the most beautiful woman standing at the opposite wall with a group of women. He couldn’t keep his eyes off of her as she instructed the class. It was like he was hypnotised, but at least he was happy about it. Her figure was strong, and she commanded the attention of the women with ease and a stunning smile that made her eyes sparkle.

He dropped his bag onto the floor and folded his arms, as he watched on in wonder while she instructed them to loosen up with various stretches. The way her body bent and twisted into the poses was enough to make him stir under the belt.

Lost in his daydream, Sam didn’t realise the instructor had turned away from the class and walked in his direction. Lost in the sight of her plump lips and then he realised that she was looking at him. No, not just looking, her lips were moving. She was talking to him. He snapped out of his haze and apologised for not hearing.

“Are you here to assist with the self-defence class?” Her eyebrow raised at him, slight confusion on her face.

Now that she was in his personal space, Sam felt nervous. He was usually so quick and an absolute charmer with women. Well, with most people, young and old. He’d get himself out of any situation and this is when he needed his wits about him.

“Uhm- No, I think there’s something wrong with my eyes.” Sam wrinkled his nose and cringed at his train of thought.

The woman looked at him with widening fear and reached out to take his arm, “Right, okay, what do you need? What’s wrong?”

The feel of her soft skin warmed his arm in an instant, a tingle bloomed across his cheeks. Then he refocused back on his plan, even if it could potentially end badly, he wanted to charm her.

“I just can’t take them off you.” Sam grinned, but it dropped when he saw the scowl, she was giving him.

Suddenly the most beautiful sound came from the woman, the laugh that fell from her lips made him feel like a cloud, completely soft and weightless. And the sight of her head thrown back brought the grin back to his face. It worked.

“But I am more than happy to help out with the class.” Sam’s smile didn’t drop but his heart raced at the thought of his offer being rejected.

“Oh, you are definitely helping out now.” grabbed his bicep and brought him to the front of the group. “Now ladies, this is-”

“Sam” He waved and gave them a lopsided smile. “Sam Wilson.”

“Sam is going to be our test dummy for today’s session.” Y/N grabbed a [added vest and handed it to him, “now put this on and be a good boy so these Ladies can practice kneeing someone in the stomach.”

“What? I thought you were going to wrestle me or something.”

“Nuh-uh, good luck sugar.” She grinned.

“Wait, do I get to know your name?” Sam asked as he pulled on the vest.

“You can call me Boss Lady.” She replied and returned to the group of women.

Sam didn’t miss the teasing smirk she sent his way as she walked away and discussed the techniques with the women that were lining up to practise their recently learned moves on him. He was glad he had this padded vest and years of training in the army to deal with the blows about to come his way.

At least he got to meet her, see that stunning smile, and hear that beautiful laugh. It was all worth it.

Y/N stroked her fingers through her hair, a failed attempt to tame the flyaway while giving herself a once over in the pocket mirror. Nerves swirled in her stomach as the Uber approached the Italian restaurant. She wasn’t sure if this was a good idea or not, she hadn’t been on a date in over a year and she had only known this guy for a few weeks through an online dating app.

The maître-d took her coat then led her to an empty table, leaving her to browse the drinks menu. Y/N wasn’t fazed by being here before him, she was a little earlier than planned and decided to order a glass of wine.

Yet, the minutes ticked by. Y/N sipped on her drink, eyes focused on the entrance for any sign of her date but after twenty minutes and an ignored message, she decided to ask the waitress to clear the reservation and bring over the cheque for her wine. She wasn’t going to sit there any longer, waiting for someone that wasn’t going to arrive.

Feeling scorned by being stood up, she left the restaurant in a flurry but tried to remain composed and swiftly began to walk down the block to the busier part of town to hail a taxi. But before she reached the end of the sidewalk an illuminated sign across the street caught her attention. Compound. It was the place that Sam had mentioned to her earlier in the week when they were at the gym.

They’d formed a good friendship over the last few months and with a few of the other regulars at the gym. Sam had invited Y/N alongside Bucky and Nat who were personal trainers at the gym. Y/N knew them well but had declined the invite to the bar that was now opposite her. She made up an excuse, unsure as to why she lied about needing to go to her parents.

But now that she was here, she might as well put the time she had in getting ready to good use. She could just think of some other excuse and pretend like the evening hadn’t started as badly as it did. With a renewed surge of confidence, she skipped across the street and entered the bar.

It was busy but considering it was a Friday night, most people ventured further into town for a night out. She spotted Bucky and one of his best clients, Steve, at one of the pool tables in the corner. Bucky had just broken the set and Steve moved to take his shot. That’s when Y/N saw that Natasha was here too, almost hidden from view by the muscular giant that was Steve. Y/N was sure that Natasha never looked less than radiant, she never looked out of place anywhere. She was perfect.

Y/N removed her coat and hooked it up, uncertainty starting to worry her about turning up unannounced. She shook it off and walked over to the bar to grab a round of beers to take over to the table, she couldn’t go over there empty-handed.

At the sound of her name being called, she turned around to see Bucky, his signature smile on his lips and arms opened wide to welcome her in a light hug.

“Hi Buck, parents didn’t need me so thought I’d gate crash.” Y/N grinned and held up the bottles, “And I have beers.”

“Always welcome. But we need one more.” Bucky gestured over to the table, the new addition at the table was Sam.

An unexpected rush of butterflies assaulted Y/N’s stomach as she ordered the remaining beer and walked over to the bar with Bucky in tow. She greeted everyone, pausing as she approached Sam. This was the first time she’d seen him in something other than gym clothes and she appreciated the form-fitting shirt that hugged at his muscular arms.

“Somebody call the cops because it’s got to be illegal to look that good!” Sam bellowed out and held out his arms, gesturing up and down her body.

Y/N couldn’t help the giggle that erupted and wrapped her arms around his neck. She was glad that her date had stood her up because now she was able to enjoy the night with friends that wanted her to be around. Plus, who doesn’t love a confidence boost from a handsome guy?

Even though Sam used the most ridiculous lines to get Y/N’s attention, something was charming about him. It was a confidence boost for sure and when later that night, he asked her on a date, she secretly hoped that it was going to lead to something more. Even if the rational voice in her head told her not to get attached too soon.

Sam couldn’t believe his luck; they were on their fifth date and Y/N had invited him up to her apartment for coffee. Of course, he hoped it was code for sex. But honestly, he didn’t mind if that didn’t happen, he just wanted to spend more time with Y/N. She was great company, had a wicked sense of humour and was genuinely fun to be around.

Nerves bubbled in Sam’s stomach while he waited for Y/N to return with their drinks. He had sat on the cosy couch that was adorned with plush cushions and the softest blanket he’d ever felt but he needed to distract himself from the butterflies somersaulting in his stomach. A display of photographs and memorabilia adorning one of the walls caught his eye and he wandered over.

Several photographs of Y/N with different groups of people; at festivals, out for dinner, on vacation. Some of the frames had ticket stubs tucked into them, the other frames had ornaments hanging from them or polaroids stuck to the corners. It was a collage of happiness and colour. He couldn’t help the smile that formed as he thought of all the possibilities of their dating heading towards making memories like this, together.

Sam returned to the couch and Y/N placed the cups onto the coffee table. He noticed the change in her body language; she smoothed down her skirt several times, a coy smile played on her lips as she sipped on the drink. He grinned, she was on the same page as him and maybe just as nervous.

“We don’t have to do anything.” Sam’s voice gained her attention, “I’m happy to wait and see where things go if that’s what you’re worried about.”

Y/N’s eyes sparkled, she looked as if the weight of the world had been taken off her shoulders and then she plunged towards him. Their lips met in a heated kiss; Sam was shocked at the sudden change of pace, but he couldn’t resist the need to feel her body pressed up against him.

They both pulled back for air, and Sam brushed his knuckles against her cheek, “I guess that means you do want to do something.”

Y/N bit her lip and shuffled backwards, straightened up and gestured for him to follow her to the bedroom. Sam kicked off his shoes and loosened his tie in the doorway, completely enamoured by Y/N while she removed her heels.

“Sam, can you help?” Y/N looked behind and pulled her hair over her shoulder, exposing the zip that she couldn’t quite reach the top of the dress.

Slowly, the zip glided down, showing a hint of the black lace underwear. Sam looked up to the ceiling, thanking God for the beauty before him. She turned around and began unbuttoning his shirt, her fingers delicate and features focused on the clothing. But there seemed to be an air of nervousness coming from her.

Sam tipped up her chin before she could finish undressing him. He kissed her lightly, in hope to ease her, comfort her.

Their lips parted and he rested his forehead against Y/N’s, “as I said, we don’t have to do anything.”

Y/N nodded and guided him to the foot of the bed to take a seat, “I’m okay. It’s just been a while.”

Sam was in a similar situation and didn’t want his nerves to add to the concern that was already laced on her features as she stood in front of him, “We’ll do this at your pace.”

She nodded, a smile now taking over her features as she removed her arms from the sleeves of her dress and letting it pool at her feet. Sam’s mouth dropped agape as he took in her all beauty; the soft skin that curved and dipped in exquisite ways.

His hands rubbed at his thighs and looked back up to the woman who approached cautiously, a smirk on his face, “I hope you know CPR because you are taking my breath away.”

Y/N bit her bottom lip and straddled his lap, “I think I’m pretty good at mouth to mouth.”

Sam held her waist with one hand, the other exploring and massaging the exposed skin of her thighs, her hips and stomach before he reached for her neck. Their lips crashed together, and they shuffled up the mattress, exposing more of their bodies and letting passion guide them through the remainder of the night.

The episode of The Big Bang Theory played in the background, Y/N was too occupied with painting her toenails, her feet rested on the coffee table as she tugged up her sweatpants for the fifth time in the hopes to not smudge the polish.

Sam had been in the bedroom for ten minutes, putting on an outfit that he needed Y/N’s approval on. At least they’d ordered food before he went in there because otherwise, Y/N would have consumed everything in his fridge which didn’t consist of much other than a block of cheese and a bottle of vodka.

The buzz at the intercom made her jump but luckily there were no smudges to her newly pampered feet.

“I’ll get it,” Y/N shouted from the lounge of Sam’s apartment and headed to the front door to wait for the delivery person. She handed the guy some bills and a little tip before hitting the door shut with her hip.

Y/N held onto the pizza boxes and bottle of soda tightly and cautiously made her way down the hall. She waited for Sam to appear, but he still hadn’t come out of his bedroom. It was getting a bit ridiculous now.

“Sam, hurry up or your food is going to go cold.” She called and poured out the drinks.

“What do you think?” Sam asked as he entered the room, arms wide as he twirled slowly.

Sam was in a crisp white shirt, smart black trousers, and a suit jacket. The bowtie was a little crooked, but it made his sheepish grin all that more endearing to her.

“A little formal for movie night don’t you think?” She smirked and dipped an onion ring into the garlic sauce.

“Thought it might impress you.” Sam grinned at her, “Thought it would bring a bit more class to the charity gala. We need to raise money for the community centre.”

“Well, I think you look rather handsome and I’m sure someone will bid a lot of money on you.” Y/N’s eyes squinted at him, for being reminded that Sam was being auctioned off alongside Steve and Bucky for dates to the rich women of New York.

Y/N knew they weren’t exclusive, but she knew they weren’t dating other people, they just hadn’t talked about that. It had only been a couple of months since their first date and as much as Y/N was enjoying Sam’s company, she didn’t want to rush into anything or mistake how she felt and that it was unreciprocated.

“Do you know what my shirt is made of?” Sam walked towards her and knelt to be at her eye level, “Boyfriend material. Yeah, I like the sound of that.”

Sam pressed a kiss to her cheek then stood back up to return to the bedroom while Y/N remained glued to the spot, eyes wide at the way he’d casually pulled off another cheesy line and quietened her insecurities in one swift movement. She was falling, hard.

Sam pulled the van into the driveway, feeling giddy at the sight of Y/N standing on the porch with their realtor. The sun beamed down onto Y/N’s skin, an ethereal glow as she spoke animatedly with Phil, probably talking his ear off about the cost of hiring a van themselves in comparison to hiring a removals company.

It had taken them a while to get here but Sam was over the moon to be where they were now. Everything came into alignment, apart from the odd bump in the road. But after many sleepless nights, a last-minute scramble for cash and only a few days to pack up their separate lives; they were finally moving into their dream home.

They had talked about this for months, both unsure to take the leap when viewing different houses until this one came along. The minute they walked into the place, it felt like home. It was vacant and they were able to imagine what it would look like with their belongings; where the sofa would look best in the lounge or which room should be the guest bedroom or office space.

Of course, the kitchen was Sam’s favourite place, it was open planned and the best for socialising and he couldn’t wait for everyone to come round for a barbecue as the French doors opening onto a patio that stretched into a neat lawn. Perfect for hosting their friends this summer.

“Did you get lost pumpkin?” Y/N smiled at him.

“Never, I’m like a homing pigeon when it comes to you.” Sam chuckled, “are we ready now Phil?”

The middle-aged man that had a childlike spark, gave him a curt nod, and headed into the property, “Right this way.”

The papers were signed, and all that was left was to be handed over the keys so that they could begin unloading their belongings. The atmosphere was charged with excitement as Phil placed a set of keys into Y/N’s hands.

“Be careful with those.” Sam gave her a lopsided smirk and a raised brow.

“I’m not going to lose them!” She retaliated.

“Yeah, but this one,” Sam pointed to one of the keys, “is a special one.”

Y/N turned to him, brows knitted together in confusion, “what are you going on about Sam?”

Sam placed his hands on her shoulders, focusing her attention on him. His face lined with seriousness, “It’s the key to my heart.”

Y/N groaned and rolled her eyes, shaking her head at him.

“Nailed it!” Phil said as he high fived Sam, “Now, I will leave you lovely pair to get acquainted with your new home.”

Y/N placed the keys onto the kitchen island and looked out onto the garden. Sam’s arms wrapped around her waist; his chest pressed tightly to her back.

“We did it, baby girl,” Sam whispered into her ear and lightly pecked her cheek.

“That we did.” She turned her head to capture his lips with her own.

Y/N grabbed the plates, shoving them into the dishwasher while Sam waved Steve and Peggy off from the front door. It was a good date night, regardless of the lack of wine. Peggy was almost ready to burst with the twins that had wriggled constantly in her belly. They’d finally decided on a name but refused to tell Y/N or Sam.

“Anything else I need to do, baby girl?” Sam asked as he returned to the kitchen.

“All done in here.” Y/N yawned, “Think it’s time for bed.”

Sam’s face dropped for a split second, but Y/N spotted it. She wandered round to his side of the room and wrapped her arms around his neck, fingers massaging the back of his head.

“What’s up?” She asked, pressing a light kiss to his lips.

A grin formed on his lips, the warmth spreading to her in an instant, shared happiness was a beautiful feeling.

“I was just thinking that I don’t think there’s anything I’d like to change about you.” He swayed your body to the music that filtered through from the music dock in the living room.

“So why the grumpy face?” Y/N pouted and squeezed his cheeks together; lips mushed into a dramatic grimace.

“Because I realised there was something I’d like to change,” Sam mumbled through your hold on his face.

Y/N pulled away instantly, her hands dropping to her side as anger began to bubble under her skin, “excuse me?”

Sam tugged her by the waist, keeping her close, “Let me finish.”

She relaxed the tension in her body and placed her hands back on his chest, the annoyance still simmering but less noticeable. Sam’s fingers traced soft lines up and down her back until she gave in and placed her head on his shoulder.

“Now, where was I? Ah yes, the one thing I’d change about you.” He spluttered as Y/N hit him on the arm, lightly but still effective. “The only thing would be your last name.”

Y/N cringed at the chat-up line and pulled away, breaking their hold in favour of turning out the lights in the kitchen before re-joining him but he was nowhere to be seen when she turned around. The sudden silence had her on edge as she headed to the lounge to find Sam kneeling in front of her, his hand raised with a velvet box.

She gasped and clamped her hand over her mouth, he was being serious. He wasn’t using some cheesy chat-up line, well he was, but he was doing this! Y/N squealed internally, the sudden realisation that Sam was talking had her snapping up to his eyes.

The gorgeous brown brimming with tears as he told her how much he loved her, “I want you in my life always baby girl, will you be my wife?”

“Yes!” she responded, throwing her arms around his neck as he spun her around the room.

Y/N pressed kiss after kiss to every place she could, their salty tears mixing in with their passion. Sam pulled back with a chuckle, he took her left hand and placed the sparkling ring onto her finger.

He might have used his cheesy pick-up lines to get to this point, but Y/N loved every single one. Especially this one.

The End.

SSB2021 Square Fill → Proposal // @star-spangled-bingo

Everything Tag List: @kitkatd7 / @fandomfic-galore / @writerwrites / @thefridgeismybestie / @wedonttalkaboutitenough / @courtneychicken

Marvel Tag List: @natasha-danvers / @little-baby-vixen / @stuckonjbbarnes / @starlightcrystalline / @nekoannie-chan / @hailhydra920 / @vollzeitliebe / @fitzsimmons-is-forever / @ladyacrasia / @emmabarnes

#Sam Wilson x Reader #bonkyshalfwayto1k #SSB2021 #Sam Wilson #Sam Wilson Fic #Star Spangled Bingo #Sam Wilson Fluff #Sam Wilson Fanfiction

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btsmosphere · 4 years ago

Text

Crossfire | KTH

Moodboard Masterlist

~summary: The night your life blew up sent you on a collision course with the campus bad boy, Kim Taehyung. Though you were well aware of his reputation, it was his doorstep you ran to when you were bleeding with nowhere to go.

~word count: 5k

~gang!au, mafia!au, college!au, angst, fluff, action, strangers to lovers, friends to lovers

Warnings: swearing, mentions of cheating (warnings apply to each part individually, please read them)

~a/n: this week our gal gets some shit done and comes to a realisation due to Yoongi... also I am once again thanking everyone for supporting this story💜💜love you all,, n for those of you who haven’t heard I’m going to be posting a spooktober story soon so stay tuned...

“I want to help.”

Tae paused in the doorway, a steaming plate in each hand, staring at you with a dumbfounded expression.

“Huh?”

“I want to do something to help, you know, with the plan,” you eagerly pressed on.

“Oh,” Taehyung nodded, but a pout remained on his face as he kicked the door shut gently behind him, “the plan with Shinhyuk?”

“Yep.”

Nervously eyeing him as he shifted onto the bed, you waited for him to speak. Instead, he just passed you one of the plates and began to tuck in.

“Taehyung?”

“Mmm,” he hummed indistinctly, looking up at you, cheeks full of food.

“So… can I help?”

For just a moment, his bewildered stare was all that greeted you and his chewing slowed.

“Mmhmm,” he nodded, as if it was obvious.

“Oh. Okay.”

Admittedly, you hadn’t expected it to be that easy. As you began to eat yourself, Taehyung quickly went back to devouring his own meal without a second thought.

For once, the two of you were inside together during the day as it was the weekend and he wasn’t required for anything except a meeting, which was happening at his place anyway. With him here, you didn’t really need anything else to pass the time, but he had still vowed to bring you some more books soon, given that you had worked your way through the first pile completely now.

After last night, and if you were honest with yourself, even before that, any worry about being around Taehyung had faded away. Not only could you easily pass the time chatting, you very much enjoyed your time with him.

However, once you had both finished your food, it wasn’t long before there was a knock on the door announcing the arrival of the boys and the start of the meeting.

Only four had come as Jimin and Yoongi were out, doing ‘something’. You didn’t ask for details.

Taking the seat furthest from the window, hopefully hidden by Taehyung who sat beside you, you simply stayed quiet for most of the conversation. They didn’t need your input anyway; the plan sounded like it was progressing as well as it could be.

First of all, Jungkook and Namjoon confirmed the first members of Shinhyuk’s group they had managed to pick off, including the leader of a base inside his territory, though the rest were low-level: drivers, informants, dealers, fighters. Not enough to make his gang disappear by any stretch.

Not yet anyway, as Namjoon kept saying in encouragement.

As they resolved to keep digging through rival members, the real challenge was finding an in within Shinhyuk’s immediate circle – the ones who apparently were mainly stationed at what used to be your house.

“All I have is names,” Jungkook sighed, “even though I’m one of them, no one reveals anything about themselves.”

“Even the names might be fake,” Jin reminded him.

“I know,” Jungkook jammed his hands through his hair, “and there’s one – Jintao – he really doesn’t trust me. Makes it difficult for me to do anything. Always has his eyes on me.”

“Y/N can help,” Taehyung cut in then, causing four heads to turn sharply in your direction. You refused to squirm under their glares.

“Tae…” Jin was the first to speak, “it’s dangerous. I’ve been staking out Shin’s clubs and I’ve almost been caught so many times trying to talk to people-“

“She doesn’t have to go out on missions,” Tae reasoned, “a lot of snooping can be done from inside, and since she doesn’t have much else to do…”

“We have access to hackers, Tae,” Namjoon dismissed.

Biting your lip, you looked down. Since Tae had accepted your request to help so easily, you weren’t exactly prepared for this analysis. Perhaps it was stupid to think you would be able to assist these boys.

“She’s just as much a part of this as we are,” Taehyung surprised you with the ferocity in his voice, “she’ll be able to help. And I’ll let her even if you guys don’t.”

Namjoon in particular looked shocked by the younger boy’s unwavering words, but you watched in relief as he gave his assent with a nod, the others raising no further argument.

“What raids are coming up, Jungkook?” Hoseok brought the meeting back on track, prompting Jungkook to relay all the dates Shinhyuk had deals or attacks planned.

You listened as the boys decided which to focus on, though again they were frustrated by their lack of progress. Until Jungkook felt safe again, they weren’t going to counter any attacks, but they could make sure no one would be in the target properties to keep their allies out of danger.

Overall, the meeting left each of you feeling unsatisfied. This war with Shinhyuk was like having an unbearable itch while your hands were tied behind your back. You could only hope their careful preparation would eventually lend them the upper hand when they felt confident enough to retaliate.

With restless minds but nothing to do, Taehyung asked his friends to stay and a movie was agreed upon. As you had observed before, the boys relaxed remarkably quickly, and you were soon laughing with Hobi and Tae as you poured out snacks in the kitchen.

As you collected the packets, Hoseok returned to sit down. You and Tae had barely set foot around the corner when Hoseok let out a yell.

Startled, your head whipped around to find Yoongi standing silently in the doorway, leaning against one side, arms folded and a murderous expression.

“I didn’t see you there,” Hoseok breathed, laughing with a hand over his heart.

Before you could stop it, a snort escaped you, barely choked back, remembering exactly what you had said about Yoongi the night before. Luckily, you weren’t the only one, as you heard Taehyung beside you laughing through his nose, more successful at suppressing the sound.

“I hope there’s good news from the meeting,” Yoongi glared at you two, “I’m going bloody insane dancing around Shinhyuk like this.”

Everyone switched straight back to business mode around you, but you made the mistake of glancing over at Taehyung.

As soon as you made eye contact, neither of you could control yourselves and you had to fight to keep in your mirth. The dark warning glances from the other boys did nothing but fan the flames. Taehyung bit down on his lips as they threatened to break out into laughter; your cheeks ached.

Sinking onto the sofa, Taehyung looked pointedly away from you, shoving his fist into his mouth, shoulders still shaking.

With the tears brimming in your eyes, you didn’t care to listen to Yoongi as he talked about whatever he and Jimin had just come back from. When Jimin came in, a strangled laugh leapt from your mouth before you clamped it shut again, but you had set Tae off again.

The orange-haired boy across the room stared at you both like you were crazy.

“What’s your problem?” Yoongi’s sour face only made it harder to remove him from the ridiculous cartoon stereotype and Taehyung finally broke, guffawing loudly with his head thrown back, before falling against you and clinging to your shoulder, tears running down his face.

Shocked to find Taehyung’s head suddenly pressed into the crook of your neck, your breathless laugh was finally cut off. All you could do was stare down at him with a smile as he pulled himself together, wheezing dramatically the whole time.

At last, he seemed to realise himself and abruptly let go of your shirt. Pulling back, you were face to face for a second, expressions reflecting each other’s surprise, before he closed his mouth and turned back to Yoongi with a flawless poker face.

“Nothing.”

And then you were laughing again.

The prospect of Yoongi almost definitely hating you now didn’t bother you anymore. In the days following the meeting, you had begun to work through the list of names Jungkook had scribbled down of the members of Shinhyuk’s current inner members:

-Gi Beomho- has a Gwangju accent?

-Chaewon/known as Seb

-(Lee?) Minho

-Soonjae

-Jintao

Taehyung had told you his laptop password and you began trawling through the internet for any traces.

Though you were by no means a hacker, one of your friends at college, Jake, had once showed you a few things he knew how to do from his course in computing. Not to mention you were able to stalk someone very efficiently on social media from investigating the hot guy Lisa had seen on the street, or finding Soo’s mysterious girlfriend she refused to introduce to your group.

Now, though, there were no friends laughing around you as you tried to take apart the gang that was living in your house.

After your first afternoon of searching, nothing fruitful came up. When Taehyung had come back in the evening, you were more than happy to abandon the task and join him in your usual dinner routine, falling asleep soon after when you settled down together to watch a film.

But as the days progressed, you became more determined and frustrated in equal measure as you came across few things. You had worked your way through 3 people, giving up only after you had exhausted every avenue you could think to investigate.

Lee Minho took you even longer than the others to rule out, though you suspected from the beginning it was an alias since he shared the name with the famous actor, meaning there was an immense amount of unrelated material cluttering any path to finding the gang member, no matter what you searched.

Slumping back against the headboard, you set the laptop aside and flipped it shut.

Your attempt at working your way through the newest stack of books Taehyung had brought you was much slower than the first time around. Until he came back home, you barely took in the words.

At your side, a notebook containing the few possible leads consistently stole your attention instead.

You had managed to gain access to a couple of police reports on a Gi Beomho in Gwangju, but you would have to verify with Jungkook whether the photo was of the right person, or if you were barking up the wrong tree entirely.

When Tae finally arrived, you anxiously greeted him. Today Shinhyuk had planned his largest attack yet, on a shop that was a front for gang activity, and you knew all the boys had been on standby.

Taking in the scattered books, paper and laptop on the bed, his shoulders slumped.

“Nothing yet?”

“No, sorry,” you confirmed with a sigh.

“Don’t apologise,” he reached out and rubbed a hand along your upper arm to your shoulder. There it lingered, fingers slowly massaging for a moment.

“Were you hurt today?”

In only the short time since he came in, he had only squeezed out a smile once as he tried to reassure you.

At the shake of his head, you felt a knot in your chest release. But he still wasn’t happy.

“So what happened?”

“We didn’t go in at all. It was a lost cause,” he sat on the bed and kicked his shoes off without energy, “he shut the whole place down. It’s done for.”

With another huff, he fell back to lie on the bed. You did the same.

Weighty silence hovered over you both.

You had no idea how long you merely stared up at the ceiling, paralysed, before Taehyung moved. Slowly, he reached his hand out, fingers finding yours. As he intertwined your hands where they lay between you, you simply let your eyes slide shut, squeezing back.

“I know you’ll find something.”

Though you appreciated his support, he said it to assure himself as much as you.

Whether he could see or not, you nodded.

Just then, Tae’s familiar ringtone chimed in the silence. Pulling his phone from a pocket, he held it above him, checking the caller. Deciding it was worth it, he reluctantly pulled his had from yours to push himself up as he swiped across the screen and held the device to his ear.

Sitting up too, you could hear Jungkook’s voice crackling out from the phone.

“Hyung, I think I-I messed up-“

“Woah, Jungkook, what happened?”

“I was in Shinhyuk’s car, and I saw a file in there, he was looking through it, and it had you guys in it! It was labelled ‘bangtan’ and it’s full of information on everyone- I didn’t know he had that, but I just- I panicked, and I stole it, and now I have it but Shinhyuk’s leaving before me and he’ll notice it’s gone and- fuck-“

You caught Tae’s eye as you both listened in horror to the scared maknae.

“Where are you Kook?” Tae demanded, eyes breaking from yours.

“Um, at Y/N’s,” he replied, “the others are just packing away-“

But before he could finish, you had reached over and pulled the phone right out of Taehyung’s grasp.

“Jungkook,” you hissed into the receiver, “there’s two loose floorboards under my wardrobe at the back, they’re pretty quiet to move, can you hide it in there?”

“Uh, yeah,” the boy responded, “thanks.”

You lowered the phone to return to Tae, but suddenly brought it back to your ear.

“And don’t look at any of the stuff that’s already in there!”

“Oh- okay,” the boy sounded startled, but Tae seemed to find your miniature panic hilarious as he took the phone back and hung up.

Saying nothing, he wiggled his eyebrows and smirked at you.

“Oh, shut it,” you ignored the heat rising in your cheeks and shoved him lightly back onto the bed, where he only laughed louder.

“It’s not even- oh you are ridiculous,” you cried as he pulled you down on top of him, only making you turn redder.

In your embarrassment, you tried to wriggle away from him, pushing on his chest, but he grabbed your wrists, bringing you back down, grin ever-present on his face.

“Hey!” you protested, and then, “Ya! Stop! Tae-“

His hands reached down to tickle your sides, and you squirmed away from him again, only to have him follow, ending up on top of you as he mercilessly continued his attack, enjoying himself far too much.

“Ohmygod, ahh, Tae, please, aaaahahaha…”

Struggling, you writhed around, legs kicking out as you shrieked in protest before you finally reached his sides and exacted your revenge. He curled in on himself, giggling and apologising to get you to stop. You did, eventually, only to throw a pillow right at his face, though he easily caught it in the hands he had held up in surrender.

Both collapsing back onto the bed, you turned your head to one side, but you found he was already looking back at you. His laughter had dissipated into a smile which you returned.

“Thanks for helping out Kook,” he said earnestly, eyes boring into yours, “I told you that you would be helpful.”

This time, your heart soared with his praise.

You weren’t hopeful about finding ‘Soonjae’, or anything that could bring him away from Shinhyuk. Having gone through half the list already, the remaining two were the people Jungkook had the least information on.

Trudging through the morning, you were reluctant to take to the computer and be met with more inevitable defeat. Today you felt particularly tired, which didn’t help.

It was strange since you had slept for a long time, waking only after Taehyung had gone, leaving you missing his presence, even if you barely touched him while you shared a bed.

Nonetheless, you found yourself sifting through links and articles online, far from the first page of Google filled with celebrities and international news. With the little information you had on the man, you ended up reading through anything and everything containing the name Soonjae. Facebook profiles, comments on newspaper articles, a GoFundMe page…

Taking a sip of water, you scrolled idly to the bottom of the GoFundMe, which was for a child after all, no gang member, and read the ‘recent’ donations (the most recent being over a year old) and comments. Nothing.

Clicking on ‘show more’, you pulled up the full comment list and scanned through. For what, you weren’t sure. Most donations were small bits and pieces, but among the ones from three years ago, one was a little more sizeable. Along with it came an interesting comment: a woman called Sara was apologising for her ‘previous words’ and wishing the boy well.

You frowned as you read it. Though it was almost certainly unrelated, you were undeniably curious as to what she might have said to target an ill child.

Clicking next on the woman’s account, you decided to try and log in. After employing the password tricks Jake had showed you, you made it. The account had been created the same day as the donation was made on little Soonjae’s page, and appeared untouched since. You supposed this tangent had come to nothing, though you were certainly pleased with your skills after getting into the account.

Closing down the tab, you searched next for ‘Soonjae GoFundMe’. There was the campaign you had already seen, followed by a few that proved to be unrelated as well. You selected ‘next page’ with little hope.

Then something caught your eye.

About halfway down, the name Sara.

Quickly selecting the page, you found yourself on Facebook instead of GoFundMe, but what you found was certainly interesting. It was the same woman from the earlier page. This time she had posted a status:

If anyone on here donates to Soonjae’s fucking gofundme get ready to be cut out of my life XD cheaters don’t deserve your pity

That was certainly interesting. No wonder she had apologised to the boy – it also explained her big donation – probably given out of guilt.

But re-reading the status, you realised she couldn’t possibly be talking about the boy. Unless by ‘cheater’ she meant that he had cheated on a test in school, but you suspected that was not the case.

You clicked on her profile.

Her profile picture showed her holding a little boy that must be around ten, standing on a beach. Flipping through her older profile images, they stopped three years ago. Perhaps she had deleted all previous ones?

Only friends can see Sara’s photos

Only friends can see Sara’s timeline

“Not just friends…” you muttered, getting to work.

Unluckily for Sara, she had used the same password as on her GoFundMe, so you logged in easily.

The first thing you saw was that she reportedly lived in your city: a promising start. Scrolling through to three years ago, you saw only one other post close in time to her attack on Soonjae and his fundraising page:

Sara is feeling: heartbroken X(

That lead you nowhere, so you made your way back up her feed, seeing photos of her son and meals with friends. Few stuck out as anything but happy, all possibly related to the mysterious events of three years ago.

That’s right, delete your fucking facebook. I don’t need to worry about blocking you now XD

Sara is feeling: defeated☹: Just got out of court. Nrs

What was the point in all this? Just to prove something? Well you did, you proved I was right all along

Now you really were intrigued. You needed to find out what was going on, she was definitely linked to a Soonjae in your city, so you had reason to investigate further. Still, as you clicked on the messages icon, you felt very much like a trespasser.

Searching for ‘Soonjae’ at the top, two conversations were pulled up, both from three years ago. One with ‘Park Soonjae’ and one with ‘Help Soonjae’.

First choosing ‘Help Soonjae’, recognising the profile picture as the same image used on the GoFundMe, you read the exchange of messages.

Sara: What the fuck is this?

Sara: I can’t believe you’re pulling the pity card after what you’ve done

Help Soonjae: Excuse me?

Sara: You know what I mean

Help Soonjae: Ma’am, I don’t know you but please calm down. I will block you, this page is only trying to raise hospital funds for my son. I’d thank you to explain how this is ‘pulling the pity card’

Sara: Wait… Oh my gosh, I am so sorry!

Sara: I can’t apologise enough, I thought this was my husband’s page, he has the same name as your son! I didn’t check the page before messaging, I didn’t mean to offend you or your son

Sara: I’ll make a donation to your page to make up for this. I wish your son the best

Read 15:47

And that was the end of that. Wincing with second hand embarrassment, you quickly moved on to ‘Park Soonjae’.

Soon, you realised that the message history was long, but it all ended three years ago. You gave up on scrolling your way to the top, seeing that most messages consisted of ‘I love you’s and reminders to buy milk. The final conversation, however, gave you a lot more information.

Sara: What the fuck is this?

Then followed a screenshot of a GoFundMe page: Help Soonjae win Custody

Sara: You cheated. Maybe you should write that in your description.

Soonjae: Sara, I’ve told you I’m sorry

Sara: And I’ve told you that’s not enough. We are over

Soonjae: I can understand that. I just can’t understand why you want to keep my son from me!

Sara: HOW CAN YOU NOT TELL?!?!

Sara: I never want to see you again, and I don’t want kai to either

Soonjae: How can I make it up to you without going to court? I can’t afford the fees and you know it

Sara: You can’t ‘make it up’ to me. And it’s not my problem anymore if you can afford it or not. I’m blocking you

And that was it.

You wasted no time in opening Soonjae’s profile in a new tab, before taking a screenshot of the messages and logging out of Sara’s account.

Soonjae’s account was indeed deleted, confirming him as the target of Sara’s earlier status update. One search for new profiles under the same name showed no one promising. Your ‘breakthrough’ seemed more trivial now you had taken a step back from it. Without a picture of the Soonjae you had found, you couldn’t confirm if you were on the right target.

You had one last option, and searched for the GoFundMe Sara had sent a screenshot of. At last you found it, though it took a while as it had been declared finished and was from so long ago.

But, once you opened it, it turned out Sara’s screenshot hadn’t included the full photo at the top of the campaign. It had only showed a baby cradled in someone’s arms, but on the site, the full photo extended to show the man’s face.

This time, you did not scroll down.

You just stared.

There would be no need for Jungkook to verify if this was the right man. Those eyes had stared at you before from underneath a hoodie in your own bedroom not so long ago. And the hands that held his son had given you the wound in your side.

“Holy shit…” you breathed, taking a screenshot when you recovered from your shock.

Then you proceeded to scroll down. And it seemed like you had hit the jackpot.

The description had been updated, and the last lines read:

Thanks for the generosity. This page will be deactivated as I have now sourced funding from a private benefactor. Will update those who donated on the court result.

“Tae! Oh my god-“

You froze on the stairs.

On hearing the door opening downstairs, you had presumed Taehyung had returned, but instead, Yoongi stood in the hallway.

“Hi,” he said coolly.

“Sorry,” you murmured, but didn’t retreat back upstairs. Staring back at him, laptop and notebook clutched in your arms, you felt the need to share your breakthrough.

After a few seconds glaring at you, Yoongi moved away down the hallway. Taking a breath, you followed.

“Um, sorry, I thought you were Tae,” you spoke from the door.

“Ok,” came his short reply as he rooted in the fridge.

“Actually, er,” you pushed, making the boy at least turn around and acknowledge your presence, “I wanted to show him something. But… I can show you instead. You know how I was searching up Shinhyuk’s closest members, well, I think I found something.”

His unimpressed face vanished at least a little, and he nodded, taking a swig from the drink he had picked.

“Okay,” you placed the laptop on the island and opened the screenshots you had saved, “so I found this woman’s messages with a Soonjae in the city, they were getting divorced but he couldn’t afford the legal costs to fight for custody of their son.”

Yoongi leaned forwards to read the screen and you stepped aside, worrying your lip. Watching him read, you leaned against the counter to support your tired legs.

“Bastard,” he muttered.

“Pardon?”

“He cheated on her,” he said simply, gesturing towards the screen, drink in hand.

You hummed in agreement and flipped onto the second image.

“He set up this GoFundMe, but see how it says he then received funding from elsewhere.”

“Could be Shinhyuk, definitely,” Yoongi agreed, “I can send Jungkook this guy’s picture-“

“Actually, you don’t have to,” you cut in, “I, er, I recognise him. He was one of Shinhyuk’s that broke into my place.”

“Shit,” Yoongi breathed, turning to take a look back at the man on the screen, “good catch.”

“Thanks,” you couldn’t help but smile, “so… what now?”

Setting his drink aside, Yoongi bent over the counter and opened a new tab, sending the images to his own email, along with a final one of Sara’s details on Facebook.

“I think we have enough to work with. We can use the details for leverage and approach him.”

“Nice,” you couldn’t keep yourself from smiling. Even if only Yoongi was around to see it, you were just proud to have hopefully helped bangtan get another rival under their belt, and get closer to defeating Shinhyuk.

It seemed Yoongi had finished with the laptop, even though he hadn’t yet left the kitchen or even picked his drink up again. Awkwardly, you stepped closer to shut the laptop and slide it off the counter.

Taking a stride back towards the door, you hesitated.

“Well, erm, thanks, I’ll just- yeah.”

“Wait.”

You turned back around, surprised at just how small Yoongi’s voice sounded. Not knowing what to say, you waited as he stood shuffling his feet.

At last he cleared his throat and spoke.

“Listen, I’m sorry for, you know… trying to kill you that time,” he said. His voice was quiet, as if a lower volume would allow him to pretend he never said it.

“Well there’s a sentence I never thought I’d hear,” you chuckled.

“No, I really am,” he spoke stronger this time, actually looking at you, “I know I haven’t been the nicest and-“

“No, it’s okay,” you flashed him another smile, “I know you were just trying to protect Tae.”

He fell silent again for a moment, and you thought that might be it. But something was still on the tip of his tongue and he looked down, one hand coming to scratch his ear.

“I want to tell you I’m happy for you guys. You seem… well, really nice, and I know Tae thinks so too, and I trust him, so… yeah.”

Gulping, he looked up at you, trying to hide his mortification at the barrage of emotion he had just released. You just stared back at him, lost for words.

Maybe he had said something wrong?

“A-and, thank you for doing this work on Shinhyuk’s gang, it’ll really help us. What you did was really impressive-“

“I-I’m sorry,” you finally spluttered out, “what did you mean when you said you- you’re… you’re happy for us?”

Looking back at you, his eyes widened.

“Shit, are you guys not-“

You tried to swallow down any signs of how flustered you were, clutching the laptop tighter in front of your chest. Perhaps he didn’t mean what you thought he might-

“I thought you guys were dating. Shit.”

You couldn’t agree more with that last sentiment.

Just as you opened your mouth, without knowing what you planned on saying, you were saved by the bell. Or rather, the door.

Tae had finally come home. It would be an understatement to say he was surprised to find you and Yoongi together, in conversation too apparently. Hopefully Yoongi had finally quit his tough act and exposed his softness that Tae had insisted you would find eventually.

Yoongi was quick to inform Tae of what you had dug up on Soonjae. Taehyung put his hand on your shoulder, sending you a proud grin that made your heart race as he told you he knew you could do it.

The whole time you were aware of Yoongi watching the interaction, and you excused yourself as soon as you could, leaving the boys to themselves.

Practically running up the stairs, you were left panting as you closed the door to the bedroom. Just one short burst of speed had knocked you out, but that concern barely crossed your mind as you surrendered to the mattress, thinking only of what Yoongi had told you.

He thought you were dating? Ridiculous…

But then why had the suggestion got to you so much? Sure, you shared a bed with the guy, and you enjoyed being with him, and liked it when he held your hand or hugged you…

Fuck.

Reblogging is the best way to support me! Comment or message me to be added to the taglist!

Taglist: @kim-ji-hyeons-world @preciouschimine @just-a-dorito @ireallylikefoodandyoutube @tatastaetaemainblog @enchantingbrowneyedgirl @veronawrites @ironica-m8 @min-shadow @harleygirl808 @aianloveseven @rjsmochii @vantooru @un2-verse @pimentelssmile

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thelovelyghostwriter · 3 years ago

Note

How many responses have you gotten so far, if I may ask?

Hello, thank you for your question. I open the Q&A if you guys want updates on the survey or any problems I'm facing.

Currently, there's 380 responses in total. [It was actually 362 last night, don’t know where I got the boost overnight, perhaps that Kurapika post]

tThere's actually 84 questions in total, but I coded it in such a way that certain questions don't appear when you indicated an option. For example, if you indicated that you are not up to date with the manga (indicating that you have read the post-Election arc AND read till Chapter 390), the questions regarding the Succession arc theories and predictions will not appear. This is why the manga readers' survey is actually longer.

Currently, 149 respondents indicated that they had read up to date, and therefore, they indicated

Another example is the shippings part. For example, if you indicated you don't ship anything, you won't see the list of ships. If you only indicated that you ship, let's say, het ships, you will only see the het ships. This is to make it easier for people to do the survey. The key is for others to not answer unnecessary questions.

I'd also like to take this opportunity to talk about certain issues/explanations that I need to address.

The reason why I'm always emphasising the goal of 385 responses and above (400 is a good number) because based on calculations. I checked on MAL and that there are over 1.2 million who have watched HxH. The "population" in this case is the total number of people who have watched/read the series. Since some people do not have MAL, the actual population number is higher (currently, we do not know what is this exact number).

At 5% margin of error and 95% confidence level*, the ideal sample size is 385 in populations above 100K, and it doesn't change after 100K.

*I do not really know how to explain this, but don't worry too much about it.

Alright, so I'm at 380, do I still need more than 5 people?

Yes, I need more people. Why? I have three concerns:

1) I said this before, but I need more men/boys to do the survey.

As mentioned, I did not put demographic questions because my country is strict with asking people for personal data. While this survey is casual, I do not want to encounter future complications. However, I can roughly guess the gender composition of respondents because of certain questions and the way the survey was distributed.

Firstly, this survey blew up mostly on Tumblr and there’s a lot of mixed statistics. This says that 47% are female in 2021 and this other article says 72% of women use Tumblr in 2014. Anyway, most of my online (majority from Tumblr) are women and they had actively helped me sent it out to other women who likes the show as well. This same thing happened to my friends in real life.

Actually, this is one of the biggest limitations of this survey - convenient sampling, which is giving the survey to only people that we know. Our friends who may have similar views/interest will get to do the survey, but people that we are not friends with who may have a different view/interest does not get to do the survey. Their thoughts/opinions are not recorded.

Secondly, there are certain questions that makes it easy to guess for me if the respondent is a woman/man.

For example, the “which character do you simp for” question.

“nil” means they don’t simp for anyone by the way. Also, note that this is just the word cloud diagram. I will chart them manually in bar charts later on.

Usually, when someone indicates a lot of male characters, they are normally women/girls. The ones who indicated Killua Zoldyck and Gon are usually young girls. Of course, I’m not saying men won’t indicate they simp for a male character or something, but yea know, common sense a bit here. The likelihood of someone placing Chrollo being a woman/girl is higher than the respondent being a man. That also same goes for the shipping questions.

The survey is posted on Reddit that consisted of 83.1% males in the HxH area, according to the 1K survey that they had. This helped me boost more people (and possibly guys who do survey). However, I think only about 20 to 30 people did it (based on the boost I got after the Reddit thread was posted). I also had help from a large hxh IG account that had slightly more guy followers to give me a shoutout. I also went to reach out to some accounts whom I know the admin are guys.

I still need a bit more help though, because currently the survey results... I’m sensing that there are more women/girls who did it from the way the results are turning out.

Why is this important?

It’s simple. I cannot just release the results that had an uneven ratio of the gender of the respondents and claim that this is the hxh fandom. It won’t be representative of the hxh fandom population as a whole when there are many cis-men who actually had watched/read the show, and absolutely loved it. I think it’s important to hear people’s opinions, be it men, women, young, old.

Currently, I’m trying to attract more men to do the survey by designing my hxh analyses posts from Tumblr and transporting them to IG, because I realise they like these kind of posts and they get to see my bio profile (with the survey link) + post about the hxh survey. I also get to befriend some of them in the process (and also because I have long been wanting to post my hxh analyses on IG, but it’s just a hassle to make it into pretty poster designs). So win-win.

Of course, anyone is welcomed to do the survey. I just need help with “balancing” it out, so please help me by sending it to your bros, guy friends, boyfriends, fathers etc. Or if you know any social media platforms where most guys dominate, then yeah please send them. Or if you’re a guy, then yea go ahead and try the survey.

2) While the responses are 380 in total, the number of people who have read up to date is 149.

Okay, I’m not saying I need to get people who had read up to date to be 385 as well. Realistically, not sure if I can do it. However, most of the questions pertaining the Succession arc are the most interesting ones and it takes a large chunk of them.

So yes, it will be great to have more people to do the survey especially if they had read the manga so that we can have more respondents in those questions.

3) The 385 response calculation is only assuming 5% confidence level and 5% margin of error.

I don’t exactly know how to explain this, but I will try to quote for the margin of error:

“Company X surveys customers and finds that 50 percent of the respondents say its customer service is “very good.” The confidence level is cited as 95 percent plus or minus 3 percent margin of error. This information means that if the survey were conducted 100 times, the percentage who say service is “very good” will range between 47 and 53 percent most (95 percent) of the time.”

So if you put it in HxH context, with 95% confidence level, and 5% margin of error, it goes like this:

50% of respondents indicated that Bisky is their favourite HxH girl (this one is only one option). If this survey was conducted 100 times, the % of people who indicated Bisky as their favourite girl would be from 45% to 55%.

But if I actually key in 3% margin of error, the sample size goes up to 1056.

I’m willing to open the survey for 1.5 more weeks. Three reasons:

A) I will wait for more responses of course!

B) I am currently busy with my part-time student research assistant job during summer break till this week, and they are rushing to finish up the research paper. Therefore, it’ll be nice to just wait while I do my work.

C) I am planning to write up the theories that I had included in the survey. This means having a lot of time finding the links/threads to the theories and reading them, making sense of it. I plan to post it and also merge that in my report.

I’m closing the survey in 1.5 weeks because I need time to do up the charts and report by mid-August because I’m afraid I might be busy once the semester starts and I won’t have anytime to do this mini fun project.

Another thing I want to address:

Most of the time, certain options I created is based on technical reasons. The other reason is by mistake.

For mistakes, I went to fix them if someone highlights a mistake.

Now, for the technical reason. I did not appreciate this response in the NOTP section that says:

The reason why I listed out almost all ships in Hunterpedia, including the ones with a large age gap and the incest ones is simple - because it helps me chart easier when I put them into options. It also decreases the chances of nonsense answers like this one. It also places less fatigue on people doing the survey. Text boxes are only meant if the options aren’t clear or “others, please state” so that I can include people’s opinons.

The reason why I didn’t do that for the NOTP section is that I was unable to do a certain specific coding. That’s why it ended up as a text box. It’s also based on the assumption that if something is really your NOTP, you’d know and remember it.

Why do people online goes straight to trying to prove they are morally superior and whatnot, assuming that I listed the options because of my morality. You do not know me personally. It is based solely on technical reasons.

This is why I used this disclaimer:

Which part of this is not clear. You can leave, just like what I said in the beginning. Another thing is not following instructions and being rude about it.

I had also instructed clearly to list out the NOTP combinations. I even noted it clearly. Some people put “any incest/pedo ships”, which happened more than five times. What’s more, one response contained “don’t tell me what to do”.

Yes, I get it, you don’t like these type. But what you’re doing is making me guess everything, which is unproductive. If you don’t like certain ships that are common but a “taboo” like “HisoGon”, “Killumi”, then say that. If you say it generally, I’m just going to assume the ones on the Hunterpedia list.

Another thing is the “any toxic ships”. This is very vague. Often, some so-called “wholesome” common ships in hxh are toxic. Mind you, Killugon is also a toxic ship (let’s not be blind to the CA arc please, this pairing is unbalanced), yet almost everyone perceives it as wholesome. Most characters in hxh are toxic in their own ways, and for sure their canon dynamics if they are in a relationship are likely more toxic than what is often portrayed in the headcanon way. I am wondering what to do with this, I might put it as invalid or “no”.

This is why my instructions are to list them. I had already edited the question twice to make it even clearer yet there’s people who defy them. I’m not just doing the instructions out of fun or make people’s life harder. Those are instructions.

I do not understand why certain people have to feel offended/be rude at an anonymous survey.

I can understand if people don’t follow instructions because you might missed it out and I can help to chart it for you. It’s totally okay, everyone makes mistakes, but I do not appreciate the extra unsolicited comments about me because it implies that you have read them, you just chose not to follow it.

If you think there’s a better way to do it, then DM me. I will explain to you why I had done it so, or I might even change it based on your suggestion. For example, someone actually told me to add certain options and I did it. Another person suggested to add the non-romantic dynamics and I love that, though I think it’s a little too late to add that. Maybe in the next survey.

If you do not like the instructions, kindly exit the survey. Nobody is forcing you to do it. It won’t record your response if the survey is incomplete for one hour.

#hxh #hunterxhunter #gon freecss #kurapika #leorio #killua #killua zoldyck #kurapika kurta #leorio paladiknight

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coloraturadiva · 4 years ago

Text

A mistake - Chapter 2

Pairing: Napoleon Solo x F!Reader (You)

Summary: Napoleon comes home and finds a surprise

Chapters: Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3

Warnings: angst, pregnancy (I’m sure I forgot something...)

Word Count: 1551

A/N: a special thank you to my lovely beta @iloveyouyen ! The third and last chapter of this story has already been written so don’t worry, you’ll get to read how it ends 😉

Disclaimer: a strict work of fiction, I own nothing except the original characters and the plot line. In no way am I affiliated to any of it.

Feedback, reblogs and constructive criticism are appreciated!

Please don't post any of my content anywhere else without my permission. Comments and reblogs welcome!

Tagging some people that never asked for it and others that actually did: @iloveyouyen @littlefreya @aletheladyinred @madbaddic7ed @promptandpros @mrsaugustwalker @jencanbeyouryengeralt @radaofrivia @henrythickcavill @ladyreapermc @mary-ann84 @onlyhenrys @qualitynightkoala @eefjedegraaf @summersong69 @minillamakeup-blog @ladyreapermc

If you want to be tagged in the next chapter, please ask me!

You were walking home after work on a rainy afternoon, one of your hands resting protectively on your belly. You were still in distress, but you were also extremely excited to finally become a mother. You loved your little one to bits.

In your hand you were holding a bag with new clothes. 9 weeks had passed since you had talked to your grandmother and most of your clothes didn't fit you well anymore: you needed new maternity ones.

In the past weeks you talked infrequently with Napoleon: this mission was incredibly demanding, and dangerous, you imagined, and he didn't have many occasions to safely phone you without risking to compromise his work. You missed him terribly. He was trying, as always, to reassure you, but you felt from his voice that he was very tired and always on the edge. You would have given anything to have him home safe, resting in your bed. On a couple of occasions you tried to tell him about the baby, but you never had the courage to bother him during a mission. You would have preferred to talk to him face to face, but weeks passed and he never mentioned the date of his return, so you had made up your mind to tell him on the next call.

Once you set foot in your apartment, you realised that the light in the kitchen was turned on. Maybe you had forgotten it in the morning? You hung your coat by the door, placed your shopping bag on the console table and moved towards the kitchen.

“I can't believe that you are home late from work for the first time in years right on the day I come back from the longest of missions” his unmistakable voice coming from the kitchen made your blood freeze in your veins.

You entered the room and saw him standing by the sink, washing something he had likely used to prepare what was now cooking in the oven.

“My lovely lady is having fun without her man at home? Did you go shopping? Did you meet...” he turned around and stopped dead on his tracks. His eyes went to your abdomen. The light blue dress you were wearing didn't do much to conceal your growing roundness.

He stood there for what felt like hours, his mouth gaping, his eyes focused on your belly.

He had a bruise on his cheek, you noticed. And he looked pale and tired. In another situation you would have run to him, taking him in your arms and caressed his bruised cheek, but your legs weren't working and your brain was exploding. Say something Leon. Please, say something.

“What have you done?” he talked like a robot. His usually caressing voice sounded cold.

“What have WE done” you answered with a strength you didn't know you had. Maybe it was your maternal instinct talking?

He finally moved his gaze to look in your eyes. Your hands went to your belly.

His gaze was as cold and empty as his voice. He wasn't looking at you with loving eyes as he had done for years.

“We?”

“It takes two people to make a baby.”

“But you...”

“I am the one with a baby bump. Yes, it works like that. You were listening during biology hour.”

“I didn't want this.”

“I know, but it happened. Now we can...” you attempted a weak smile, moving a step in his direction.

“No!” he shouted at you. You took a step back, scared by his violent reaction. He had never ever shouted at you. “I still don't want it.”

The first tear rolled down your cheek.

“I envisaged it” you whispered, bowing your head.

“You should have told me.”

“Why? You don't want this baby. What's the difference?” your voice was trembling.

“I wouldn't have bothered coming here, seeing you like that...”

You looked up and shot a furious look at him.

“Listen my... Y/N. I overreacted and I'm sorry for that. Still, I can't be a father. I never wanted to be a father. I shouldn't be there.” He started walking towards the door, but you blocked his way.

“Napoleon, what are you doing?”

“I'm going away. I can't bear to stay here.”

“This is your house.”

“You can keep it, if you want. Or sell it, do whatever you want.”

“I don't care about the house! But us? I'm your wife...”

“You're right” he nodded. “I'll talk to my lawyer. I think we can solve this easily and with full satisfaction for both of us.”

“Leon, what are you saying? You want to blow up everything we built like that?”

“I can't stay like this.”

“So you leave me because something is not like you want it?”

“It's something really important.”

You sighed, he wasn't listening to you. He had already made up his mind.

“This is the one thing I've always been against. I never asked for much...”

“You never asked for much??? Do you have the faintest idea of what I do for you? I've been lying for you to family and friends EVERY. SINGLE. DAY about nearly anything regarding you to protect you and your job for years. Last year you were away from home 273 days. 273 DAYS. And when you come back you were deadly tired and bruised or injured. Most of the time I have no idea of where you are and when you'll be back. Or IF you'll be back. We can't go to certain places because you fear you can be recognised or I can be related to you. We are not even in the damn phone book and YOU dare to tell me that you never asked for much???”

“You knew about it all before marrying me. And you never complained.”

“Because I love you, you idiot! I endured it all for you, because I wanted to be with you despite it all.”

He bowed his head and stayed silent for a moment. You were right, you knew it.

“This just happened” you began, getting closer to him, resting your hand on his arm. “It's nobody's fault.”

“I'm not accusing you. I just saw it coming. I knew a baby would have come to separate us. We couldn't be happy together for too long.”

“It's your baby Napoleon, for God's sake!”

He looked at you like you were speaking an unknown language.

“I... I have to go”. He moved away from you and went to the front door. “I'll come tomorrow to get my things when you are at work, so I won't disturb you. I'll have my lawyer contact you for the bureaucracy. You can keep everything you want.”

He turned his back to you and opened the door.

“Leon, we can't end it like this...” you started to cry.

“I know, but there's no other way.”

“I want you.”

“You can't have me. Not like this.”

He closed the door and walked away, into the night.

You felt all your strength slip away from you. Your legs turned into jelly and you had to lean on the wall to carefully help yourself to sit on the floor.

It went exactly how you had envisioned. It was your worst nightmare taking place in real life. He couldn't even look at you. You had shared so much and now everything was gone. All ruined.

No one made a mistake. No one did anything wrong. Yet, both of you were paying the price of it.

Well, three of you. Your baby having to grow without a father will be paying as well.

This was so unfair.

You felt your heart breaking into small pieces. You literally felt it burn in your chest.

You loved him.

Despite everything, even what had just happened, you still loved him.

You curled on the floor, caressing your belly, and cried uncontrollably for hours. Your sobs were loud. Your neighbours had probably heard you from their apartment. You didn't care. You were physically hurting so much and being heard was the last one of your problems. You needed to throw out at least a bit of that pain. But it didn't work. You were just desperate to have him back, even if he was the cause of your pain. You couldn't believe that he was now your ex husband. You had hoped to spend all your life with him, fearing only the dangers provided by his job could take him away from you, but instead it was your defenceless and innocent baby to separate you. How ironic!

It should be his hands caressing your bump to soothe you, not your own. He should be here cuddling you, whispering you reassuring words, but he was gone.

The thought of not seeing him again felt like a slap on your face.

You'll have to do it all by yourself. Going through the pregnancy, giving birth, raising the baby. Alone.

You should be hating him for how he behaved, for how he treated you, for having abandoned you, but you couldn't do without loving him anyway.

Sometimes things are easier when you hate someone.

You weren't good at hating in general, and it was impossible for you to hate him.

He would still be the love of your life, despite everything.

And this hurt even more.

#henry cavill #henry cavill fanfic #napoleon solo #napoleon solo fanfic #fanfic #fan fiction #the man from uncle #napoleonxreader #napoloeonsoloxreader #napoleon solo x reader #napoleon solo x you #x you #napoleon solo xfemale!reader #writing

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energyanon · 3 years ago

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Hi Guys, I hate doing this, I am sorry if this is harsh, I’m trying to come at this as nicely as I can, but I do need to be FIRM on this aswell. This isn’t an attack, merely an education. This was a nice little area for a while, now its started to go too far:

Over the past couple of days and especially last night, I have seen an influx of people sending me their own readings.

This is my fault, I have been encouraged and interested in seeing others try this out - it was my assumption that these had been done with knowledge or experience, and that there would be one MAYBE two others. Multiple readings that I received last night were not.

I have been doing this for enough years to know that constellations are rare for people to know and even rarer for people to be able to facilitate. Considering you have to train for it, and read about it, practice with multiple situations and scenarios for years. This isn’t just another version of tarot thats “easier”, just as tarot takes years to perfect and understand what you are feeling, so does this. The difference is, if you get it wrong, you are fucking with someone’s energy. Which is exactly what I have been sent.

Unfortunately everyone is on anon I can’t pinpoint the people exactly, and I can’t speak to them privately, hence the public notice. Note: Not everyone fucked up, so I am sorry that you are being included in this, as you are anon i can’t tell you who you are or arent. You will know if you are apart of this once you have read:

I cant stop you from doing this, some of you seem to believe you can just step into it, without any proper set up or consideration to the energy. Fine, I can’t stop you. But please be more cautious with what you are doing. I have said before that when you’re doing readings, they should not know that they are happening, but with what a couple of people sent me last night, id be surprised if they weren’t feeling weird AF today with how many people were warping their shit on their behalf. Only one of you did this correctly, but still said something concerning which is why I also have to bring it up.

Here are some guidelines that if you are going to continue at least follow these:

1. Once the energy has stopped, you stop. If something is hidden to you, you stop. You do not “see if you can try again” you stop. It’s hidden from you for a reason. Remember, if this were being done on you and you wanted to protect someone, something or a secret, you have the right to protect that. No one has a right to gain access or force access into that.

2. You observe the energy ONLY. do not CONTACT the person. You do not encourage anyone to go on to a different path that they are currently on. You don’t speak to them as you v them. Can you IMAGINE if some random came up to you and started talking about your life and trying to get you go or do something else? Youre quite literally hijacking that person. NEVER do that. Never ever do that. Never.

3. When i do questions, notice that I wait until the energy has no further movement. until that is done, you will not be getting an accurate answer, as the energy is not done moving. When I ask questions, I am not giving them suggestions or help, I ask a question, they answer. If i need clarification, I’ll get one, but I otherwise move on. 4. Answers are short for a reason, if your person is speaking in full sentences, that is you getting in your head about it.

5. And every single one of you should have felt when the energy was off. I even read that the energy is off, I don’t know how you wouldn’t feel it. If you didn’t feel it, you need to practice more, if you did feel it and ignored it, you need to stop what you’re doing.

6. You cannot just walk into a reading and hammer these people with questions, technically it’s not wrong, but it’s not respectful. They don’t owe you anything. You need to be more careful with this. Please, please, if you are going to continue this practice with a friend or with yourself that has given permission. This isn’t a joke, I know it seems like something that is easy, but it’s not, you have to cleanse yourself and the energy afterwards, you need to be attuned to if the person in front of you is uncomfortable and guide them back to the place they were before you jumped in. One question you need to ask: If this goes south, and they have a sudden reaction, if you’ve set up the field wrong and they’re now feeling YOU, do you know how to guide them out of that? Because i’ll tell you that once happened to me while I had a practice session with someone - they didn’t know that what where they were gonna place me would trigger me, they didn’t realise what was happening soon enough and I went into a straight up panic attack, Hyperventilating, crying, we had to end it, even the facilitator had to take an hour to get me back to a calm (because the person wasn’t even able to close it properly, they got spooked and just ended it). That calm isn’t where it ended, I was in a depression for days. This isn’t something to fuck around with. If you’re doing it wrong, you can cause harm. If you don’t know how to get them out of it. DO NOT. DO IT. I will not post any more readings from anyone else unless I can see that the above guidelines have been followed. I understand that some people were curious or excited, that’s really great, i’m not here to dull your enthusiasm, but please please practice elsewhere until you are able to follow the above without even having to think about it, and until you know how to guide them back if the reading goes to shit. Not just for their sake, but for you aswell. I know some of you said that you “continued to feel x for hours” you should feel nothing else but yourself immediately after the reading is done if you have gotten yourself out of it. If you do not know how to do this, please do not do a reading until you know how to do this, or practice with someone who can get you out.

This is also my mistake, I was getting a bit silly in my responses yesterday, we were all having fun. I have also had some fun with my own readings in terms of my commentary, this could also have been misinterpreted, from now, I will make sure that the reading is the reading only, and it is written in a more serious manner. I can understand how that was misinterpreted as readings just being light and fun. My mistake. I apologise.

I also understand that all of you only had pure intentions. The intentions aren’t the issue, it’s the actions that were made. I’m not mad at anyone, you just need to understand what can happen.

#I am also reconsidering doing readings in general #hence I have taken the calendar down #I will also not answer any questions from last night #as many of them ask about set up or how this works #and I feel that’s just becoming an invitation to more people coming into something that they are unaware of #I should have been much more careful from the beginning

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wallwriterstuff · 4 years ago

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Dear Sister Part 2 ||Alec Volturi x Female Reader||

Dear Sister Part 1

Words: 5451 Warnings: A lot more swearing than I intended, and a fair bit of angst

So this took a lot longer to put up than I had intended it to but unfortunately real life got in the way, but I’m back and ready to get my writing on beautiful humans! Keep your eyes peeled for more requests and some more random crap from the inner workings of my mind :D

Request for @tiger-khans-blog: Hey there I am really amused by your style of writing stories.Can I ask you another request for Alec Volturi? The thing is Demetri's younger younger Sister the reader fled from her family.As they had the tradition to get the girls married in a early age.And the reader is a Creator gifted Vampire.The Volturi gets to her.She is asked to join them.She recognizes Demetri immediately.She goes and hugs him.Demetri recognizes her.And she finds out that Alec and her mate bond.That's why she decides to torment Alec.So that he doesn't want her.But everything goes opposite.Alec falls for her head to heels.Then her Casanova image gets revealed that she is no less than her brother. Alec tries to convince her to give him a chance.Then Alec tries all the ways to make her fall in love with him too. Then she lastly agrees.Demetri gets against of this relationship.Then he tries to make them separated.But he becomes unsuccessful. As Jane is his mate.

How on Earth did they get here?

Alec could only blink as she slammed him into the wall of his room. He felt the stone crumble around his shoulders as she pushed him further into the rubble. He grit his teeth, a sharp sting running over his skin as the venom sealed the small cracks breaking apart his flesh.

“You did this!” she snarled. It was such sweet agony feeling the heat of her body so close to his, her skin sending sparks flying across his own. He wished it were under better circumstances.

“Actually, you were the one who invaded my room.” Alec pointed out, a hint of the bitterness he felt creeping into his voice. He was certain he was in the right; he’d not been sleeping around knowing his mate was in the same building as him after all. He had tried to get to know her, learned to love everything about her, and she’d just…thrown it all back in his face.

“What gave you the right to talk about me like that in front of all of those people? You do not even know me! You ruined everything between Santiago and me! My own brother thinks me a whore! You disgraced me in front of everyone we work with.” she was so close, her lips a hairs breadth from his own and spitting venom his way. Alec hissed, his vision flaring red briefly, but even though he was more furious than he had ever thought he could be he couldn’t bring himself to put his hands on her, to push her away. Once she stepped back he knew she’d be out of his reach forever. He could feel it deep down in his bones that this was a violent, permanent goodbye.

“Santiago should never have been with you in the first place, you belong with me! Fate has said so!” he snapped. Alec balled his fists at his sides, feeling the sweet numbness on his fingertips and knowing he would unleash it if he wasn’t careful enough. He glared her down, her own black eyes swallowing him whole. How was any of this fair? Her anger was unjustified! His was not! He had every right to be furious with her obvious disregard for their bond.

“Fuck fate! I belong to no one! How dare you assume you have ownership of me because you felt your dick twitch when you first saw me!” she spat, shoving away from him. He felt his shoulder crack unpleasantly but ignored the sting of it healing, too busy seething and trembling as he fought back the urge to lunge at her, trap her against the door she was walking towards so she couldn’t leave him. Had all those days spent in the library been wasted? Did she really feel nothing for him? Did she not see he that he would do anything for her?

“Y/N-“

“Keep my name out of your mouth, you have no right to speak it,” she hissed, turning in the doorway to send daggers his way with her eyes one last time. “Keep far away from me Alec Volturi. For the eternity I have left on this Earth I do not ever want to see it again.” She slammed the door shut behind her and Alec crumpled. Venom stung his eyes for the first time in years, and a horrible heaving noise echoed through his room. He didn’t realise it was him until Jane rushed to his side and pulled him close.

Alec hadn’t cried the way he did right then since the day they’d burned.

Y/N wasn’t around for a very long time after that. Months passed without her presence and Alec grew entirely numb to it all. He went to trials, stood in the background on missions, but nothing changed, he didn’t change. Alec had become utterly mute, not even Jane could get him to speak a word anymore and he spent all of his free time sitting in front of the fireplace in his room, stroking the worn cover of a copy of Private Berlin. Y/N had introduced him to the series and this was his favourite one; she’d bought all of the books for him and in his rage this was the only book he hadn’t destroyed. Every passing moment of his day felt like a fight against quick-sand that was trying to drag him down, and he was so, so close to giving up. What was the point? Y/N had taken half of him with her when she left and there was no good reason to continue unless he could become whole again.

Demetri often received post cards from her, and he had heard whispers of what these postcards contained. Clearly, she was having a wonderful time. She was travelling the world and sampling all the types of people each continent had to offer. It made Alec’s very soul ache whenever he had to hear about it. Given his empty state of being it wasn’t hard to understand why nobody really came to check on him anymore – he was hardly offering the most scintillating conversation - which was partially why he was so confused to see Demetri sitting in front of him on his sofa. The tracker looked sombre, forearms resting on his knees as he glanced down at the book in his hands before looking up to meet his eyes again.

“Alec you have to stop this. We are all worried about you.” Demetri sighed. If he had the capacity to feel anything at all, Alec would be angry at him too right now. How was it fair that he could insult his sister and exchange cruel words with her, yet it was Demetri she would still stay in contact with? Alec had made one mistake! He had made plenty more. Demetri waited patiently for him to say something, anything, but Alec wouldn’t give him the satisfaction. What was there left to say after all? His mate had walked right out of his life without so much as a goodbye.

Just leave Alec thought. The very bones of him were tired.

“Jane worries for you, and I cannot stand to see her beside herself over you.” He continued.

Then Jane can tell me as much herself Alec mentally groaned, though his face remained apathetic. Demetri would never guess his head was actually full to bursting with a host of negative thoughts when his face suggested his mind was painfully blank. He traced the images on the cover of his book, heart aching sharply like it was just yesterday she had left all over again.

“When I lost my sister the first time my heart ached in ways I had never known it could ache before. I know the feeling of loss-“

“My sister holds you every night like to let you go would be the death of her. What do you know of the way my heart aches?” Alec couldn’t stop the sharp words escaping him, his tongue whipping the tracker into submission. For the first time in a long time he felt the frustration Demetri brought out in him so strongly it was able to overwhelm the numbness in his soul. Alec was somewhat to be able to feel something for once, but it brought with it the undeniable heartache already nagging in the background, threatening to drown him once more. Demetri was quiet for a long while, staring down at his hands as he thought over his words.

“Alec, I-“

“Do not lecture me on affairs of the heart Demetri, how many did you have to break before you finally found one you felt was worth keeping intact?” Alec huffed, unfurling from the curled-up position he’d been sat in to plant his feet on the floor. He ran his hands up into his hair and scrubbed at his scalps with a sigh. As angry as he wanted to be with Demetri maybe he was struggling to feel it for more than just the perpetual numbness. Maybe he couldn’t be angry because deep down, he knew Demetri didn’t deserve it. The man had lost his sister twice over. He was grieving her absence as much as Alec was.

“The first time my sister left, she was betrothed to an older man in the village who was a shoe in to become a partner in a cloth merchants firm. This merchant was one of the wealthiest men in town and her husband to be would soon have been amongst the upper echelons of society. Our family would have been propelled into wealth, status…these were the things my mother cared about. Not Y/N, though.” Demetri smiled, a wan and wistful thing that radiated hurt so intense it made Alec pause.

“What did she care about?” he asked finally. Demetri’s expression softened.

“The people she loved. She cared about the people she loved. One of them was a girl called Erato, a whore.” He told him. Alec’s brows furrowed. In a fraction of a second he had recalled every conversation they had ever had, the words imprinted on his mind and held dear in his heart as the only reminder she had ever once been with him. He understood almost immediately what had driven her away.

“He was said to have beaten all the whores in the brothel.” He quoted Y/N. Alec could remember the fire in her eyes, recall the sharpness of her tone. The anger she felt at her engagement had been obvious and the hurt had been strong enough to last a millenia. Demetri nodded solemnly.

“Erato was beside herself the night she came to Y/N, but mother would not call off the wedding. She would not trust the word of a whore and ruin our family’s chance at social success. Y/N ran away the very same night and was lost to me for a thousand years until she chose to find us. Do you not see, Alec?” he asked with a sigh. Alec’s brows furrowed, and then he settled back in his seat with a sigh.

“I see the wrong person sitting in front of me. I am tired Demetri, I don’t want riddles, if you’re here to tell me something profound then get on with it please.”

“Y/N has never been quiet about injustice! If she perceives anything that is happening to herself or others to be wrong or detrimental to wellbeing, she fights back. Bloody hell Alec! You stood from afar and never made a move to claim her as your mate!” Demetri sounded exasperated at this point and Alec couldn’t stop the hysterically choked laugh from escaping.

“She’s made it pretty clear I’m not intended to have her as my mate. She’s so powerful she can laugh in the face of fate.” He pointed out. Demetri groaned.

“But she isn’t!” he insisted, pushing to his feet and dropping a stack of colourful looking postcards on the coffee table, “Read them Alec. As loath as I am to admit it, she is miserable without you.” He shook his head as he left, the door closing a little harder than necessary. Part of Alec was satisfied because Demetri finally knew the sheer struggle of letting your sister be with someone you intensely wished they weren’t with. The other part was terrified of the small stack of cards on his tabletop. The loopy handwriting was a familiar scrawl, something that tried to be elegant but was close to illegible because she never had time to write things down, too busy experiencing the moment in real time. He could faintly smell her scent lingering on the surface of each one, and his mouth felt very dry as he reached for the stack.

Demetrius,

Paris remains lovely as ever, but the lights seem dimmer than they were my last visit. Monsieur Ardoin is as hospitable as ever. Give my regards to our mutual friends.

Love, Y/N

So she’d been to Paris had she? He tried to ignore the bitter hatred that roiled in his gut at the mention of this Monsieur Ardoin but it was hard to stop, and the next three were the same. More names, more cities. Alec scowled, slapping down the card and leaning back in his chair. His hand ran over his face, as if he could somehow scrub the words from where they’d been imprinted on his eyeballs. The colourful little cards were taunting him though, the weakest trace of her scent caressing his nose and muddling his mind.

“Damn it all to hell.” He growled, reaching for the next one. They were addictive. A fresh and recent part of her for him to treasure, but the pain in him seared deeper with every word…or not? His brows furrowed, his body leaning forward as if being as physically close to the paper as possible might bring him some relief. If his heart still beat, it might have stopped.

Demetrius,

How am I to believe your words are true? I might have once loved him, but Alec made it clear he never felt the same. How can I believe he held any sort of affection for me when he treated me no differently to any other person in the guard? I will not come back, I could not face any of them. That does not mean you could not visit me, you will always know where to find me after all, brother.

All my love, Y/N

Alec felt his eyes widen. It was…his fault? He did this? He ruined his own chance of happiness? He thought back to all those bittersweet memories he had (the only thing left of her now) where they had wiled away evenings reading in the library. They had always been opposite ends of the sofa, as was proper, never crossing that boundary, and whenever he risked glances at her she never seemed to be looking his way but the distinct tinkling of jewellery…had that meant she was looking at him and turning away before he could notice? The day they met her smirk had dropped for that briefest second, like the freight-train of emotion he’d been contending with had hit her to. Oh…oh how could he be so stupid!

He was out of the door and hammering on Demetri’s in the next second, the tracker opening the door with a deep frown.

“Alec you need to-“

“Where?” he demanded. Demetri blinked, his face going blank for a second. Alec felt every extremity twitch, the urgent need to move move move eating away at him.

“London.” He said finally, his tone obviously reluctant. Alec turned on his heel, ready to leave immediately, the consequences be damned.

“I have to-“

“Find her,” Demetri finished for him, though his face looked like he’d sucked a lemon, “I may not like it, but I suppose you have never liked it either have you? You have to find her. bring my sister home Alec…we’ll see about the rest after.” Alec very nearly laughed but the moment was too serious for that. Demetri’s acceptance of his bond with Y/N, however grudging, only made him more determined to find her.

“Tell me when you have a more precise location!” Alec called over his shoulder, already two floors down and headed for the door. Maybe the masters needed to know of his departure, maybe they didn’t, but if he was certain of anything it was his position in the guard. He was too valuable for them to lose and if he returned home with his mate…well Aro would probably be so pleased that his running away would most likely be forgotten about. Y/N had to accept him after all of this, didn’t she? What was more romantic than running across a continent and through a bloody ocean after your love? By the time Demetri called him back Alec was forced to hide in some rundown warehouse on the outskirts of a city he knew very little given its constant evolution – forgetting his credit cards was a double wounder.

The minute the sun went down he moved.

He was sure the Savile Row tailors wouldn’t miss just one Gucci suit, right? Even if it was worth over £1500. He was fairly sure that ridiculously pruned flowerbed in front of her hotel wouldn’t miss those flowers either. She had already opened the door before he had chance to knock.

“I am going to have Demetrius’s head on a stick.”

“I know you are angry but please, Y/N, give me time to explain.” He wedged his foot in the doorway, surprised when she didn’t attempt to close it. Her expression was devoid of emotion but she wasn’t turning him away just yet. Alec took it as a good sign, even if she wasn’t seemingly willing to let him in just yet.

“Your time is dwindling away Alec. Why are you here?” she asked. Alec looked her over, clearly dressed to go out and enjoy a night on the town. He held out the flowers.

“I want – no I need you to know, that every moment of your absence has been abysmal for me. I need you to know I will follow you to the ends of the Earth, endure any trial, overcome any obstacle, if it means you will understand how necessary you are to my very existence. I made the mistake of not letting you know that before, let me rectify that here, now. Give me a chance to prove to you Y/N that I cannot leave here without you.” He kept his voice firm, bold, but inside he crumbled. Here was this headstrong, independent woman who had survived the world just fine before she met him and could do so again if she made him leave. He had nothing left to do but pray she would accept him. Her eyes fell to the flowers.

“You do know I hate tulips, right?” Alec’s heart fell, chest tightening.

“I do now.” He said.

“I have dinner plans, Alec.” She sighed, leaning against the doorframe.

“Then let me take you to dinner.” He insisted.

“They are not the kind of plans that require a partner or a chaperone,” She retorted, “Maybe your life is abysmal but I happen to be doing just fine without you. Whatever Demetrius has told you in some desperate attempt to bring me home is false. You have my apologies for the inconvenience the journey must have caused.” She reached behind the door and pulled on a denim jacket, bringing some shades out of the pocket and slipping them over dark, burgundy eyes. Alec grit his teeth, watching as she locked her door.

“Demetri didn’t have to tell me anything, I read your postcards. You’re not happy, Y/N, and neither am I, so what is the sense of-“

“Opening someone else’s mail is considered a federal crime in some places. I would have thought a man devoted to upholding such laws would know that.” She snapped, still walking away from him. Alec hurried after her.

“I am not leaving until you give me a chance. Just one, Y/N, just one.” He hissed, reaching for her arm. His hand went straight through her and he stopped dead, his heart breaking all over again as she strode into the lift without breaking stride and pressed a button on the panel. She turned on her heel, pulling her shades down her nose to peer sharply at him over the black plastic rim.

“Just no, Alec, just no.” she retorted. The doors slid closed between them and Alec was left alone, jaw tight and fingers clenching into fists at his sides. He wasn’t sure how long he stood there, letting the waves of pain and frustration overtake him. He really didn’t enjoy the way a warm hand clasped his shoulder, because it wasn’t hers. Alec had whirled before the man even had chance to turn away, his teeth sinking into his windpipe and hands viciously tightening around his biceps. Bones cracked and veins burst, but it wasn’t enough to quell all of his anger. Not until the man and his wife were mangled beyond repair as well as the security guard who was guarding the CCTV tape that could have outed his very existence, did Alec manage to start thinking clearly again.

As a fire consumed their bodies in the dumpster in the next borough over, he fixed his shirt sleeves and refastened his cufflinks. He drew in a deep breath, smelling the oncoming storm in the air and simply listening to the sounds of the city. If Y/N wasn’t going to give him a chance he was simply going to have to create one, and that meant getting imaginative. What did you do for the girl that could have it all? She was powerful enough to create any gift. If she wanted something she easily got it, so how was Alec supposed to get what he wanted? Hell, she had probably already created foresight and was watching his every decision like that Cullen woman could so nothing would be a good enough surprise.

Maybe he didn’t have to surprise her though.

She was still out when he got back to her room, some stolen hotel stationary allowing him to leave a note he hoped she would read on her bed. Maybe flowers weren’t the way to her heart but another type of gift would do better? She was always wearing jewellery of some sort, so maybe some new jewellery was the way to her heart?

She never showed up at the time he had requested to meet with her.

Alec left another note a few days later, tracking her to a new hotel this time, but she didn’t show up so he could take her to the theatre either. He had hoped that a slew of invitations to various date-themed evenings would maybe make her understand he knew what he had done wrong now. He understood that by not making a move beforehand he had damaged her self-esteem and hurt her feelings, but if he could reverse that mistake now…He ran a hand over his face with a sigh, pen poised to write the latest in a long line of invitations to spend the evening with him exploring the Kew gardens. It was closed of course but that didn’t mean they couldn’t sneak in. A soft sizzling noise made him turn swiftly, fangs bared at the intruder until he realised the lingering wisps of red slowly dissipating in the air revealed the one person he wanted to see the most.

Violently red eyes glared back at him, her face set in the ugliest scowl she still somehow made beautiful. Y/N had her arms folded across her chest, her stance defensive.

“I detest flowers.” She hissed. Alec frowned.

“Then talk to me and tell me what you would like to do! I am trying Y/N and I will keep true to my vow. I will try for the rest of eternity to win you back if it’s what has to be done!” Alec said fiercely. He pushed to his feet, feeling frustration give way to hysteria as a short, mirthless laugh escaped him. “For the love of all that’s holy how can you not see the depths of my devotion to you!”

“Because your devotion is not to me!” she cried, “It never is for anybody! Your devotion is and always will be to my power! So many have sought to own me and what I can do and all have come using words and gifts as a way to try and trap me, as if I am so shallow as to be lured in by shiny things.” Alec blinked, taken aback by her tone. He had expected bitter anger, he was ready to welcome her fury and instead she simply sounded broken.

“You think I care for your gift? Y/N, my place in the guard is secure by what I can do. No threat or bribe to get you back brought me here, merely my need to have you by my side.” He murmured, frowning now. She took a step back when he stepped closer, her eyes pleading with him to stay put.

“Then why did you leave me to wonder what I did wrong?” she demanded. He had no doubt now that if she could cry she would have been. “If you felt so deeply for me why did you never say as such? I sat for months on the opposite end of the sofa to you, wishing you might feel the same for me, and when you finally decide to declare your feelings it is not to me whom you declare them but an entire room of strangers who then think of me as a whore for ignoring the very bond you were the first to neglect!”

Alec was quiet for a moment, digesting this information. His mind came up blank. There was no easy answer to it, no way to right the wrong that would ever erase the monumental amount of hurt between them.

“We’ve really made such a mess of this, haven’t we?” he said finally, lowering his gaze.

“How your sister and Demetrius make it look so easy I do not know…it is sickening.” She admitted with a huff. Alec couldn’t help but laugh, the smallest of smiles twitching his lips upward.

“I’ve been telling them so for almost three years now. I suppose that was another thing I did wrong really wasn’t it? I detest that he’s with my sister and yet I threw it in his face that I was supposed to be with his.” He shook his head. There was a pregnant pause.

“I like that better,” She said softly. Alec looked back at her, head tilting as he tried to figure out what she meant. “Be with. I like you saying be with rather than to have.” She clarified.

“That might be the first thing I’ve ever managed to make you happy with then…I truly am sorry, Y/N, for everything,” he said sincerely. She didn’t stop him this time when he stepped forward into her space, taking her hands in his owns and bringing her fingers to his lips. Her breath hitched at the delicate kiss he placed against her knuckles. “I realise now nothing I can do will ever make up for the hurt I’ve caused you, but we’ve both suffered enough haven’t we? If I can’t fix this mistake, give me the chance to start fresh with you, to make sure I don’t make anymore. I love you far, far too much to give up on you entirely, but if you can look me in the eyes and tell me you truly do not want me then…then I’ll leave now and not bother you again.”

The mere thought he might have to just leave her behind was so painful. He knew exactly what he would do if she chose to send him away now, knew exactly where he could go – the Romanians were always looking for a chance to get one up on them after all. Y/N seemed to sense the despair he was feeling. She had rejected all of his advances thus far so why would this one be any different? Her grip on his hands tightened.

“I am so tired of running from you.” She whispered. Alec exhaled sharply, disbelief showing on his face briefly before he composed himself. He tenderly cupped her cheek.

“Then stop running from me, and if you can’t bring yourself to stop running, let me run beside you.” He implored. For once when she locked eyes with him, Alec didn’t feel his stomach drop in anticipation or overcome with nerves. Everything finally felt how it should be when he was with his mate. His spirit calmed, his entire being relaxing into the moment. He didn’t even notice they had teleported anywhere until he was pushed backward and his eyes stopped zeroing in on her. He frowned, glancing about at his bookcase, his bed, all the things he was familiar with.

“Y/N…please-“

“Shhhh, if you’re not quiet enough they’ll hear you packing a bag.” She hissed, giving him a shove towards his closet. Alec blinked in shock, frozen for a minute before he broke into a wide smile, shoulders shaking with silent laughter. He had never moved so fast in all of his life.

“Would you pair please find a room?” Demetri grumbled. Jane glanced at him, her amusement obvious while she cuddled closer to his side. Alec however had no intention as stopping anytime soon. She tasted far too good and stealing kisses from her as they watched a movie was his new favourite pastime. It was only very reluctantly after another complaint that Alec pulled back from his mate, amused by her scowl. She caught his jaw before he could turn away from him.

“Ignore him, he’s jealous Jane doesn’t like the taste of brunette on his tongue.” She quipped. She pulled him back to her with a smirk and Alec grinned a bit, claiming her mouth with a more passionate kiss than before. He didn’t want to push his luck however and parted from her fairly quickly, brushing her pout with his thumb and a twinkle in his eye that promised her patience would be rewarded soon enough. With her legs slung across his lap the group had settled to watch a movie a little over an hour ago, and Alec had been distracted ever since she’d settled against her side. He still found it incredible that they had spent months roaming the world together and still needed to be near each other almost constantly to be even remotely happy. It was unhealthy perhaps, but where else would they be?

The masters had not been happy with his disappearance as predicted, but his position had, as he had predicted meant little punishment. As soon as Y/N had spoken out and told Aro less than eloquently they could easily ‘fuck off’ again, Caius was left to stew in his rage while they resumed normal duties without any severe punishment. They simply didn’t get time off for a while but that was easily worked around, easily endured knowing they were in the same place and not to be separated again.

“Fine, if I cannot kiss you I will not torment myself sitting here and take a shower instead.” Y/N rolled her eyes, kissed his lips lightly and disappeared from his side in a flash of red. Alec smiled slightly, shaking his head a bit as Demetri sighed.

“I understand it now. I understand why you hate me. I detest you Alec, I truly and thoroughly detest you.” He admitted.

“Demetri!” Jane scowled. Alec simply laughed.

“Hate me as much as you like, your sister doesn’t.” he teased. Demetri groaned a little.

“Just…she seems happy. Keep her that way, will you?” he requested. Alec turned serious then, nodding his head as Jane rolled her eyes, protesting he was being a hypocrite.

“If you agree to do the same for Jane.” He promised. Demetri nodded once, both of them quickly diverting their attention back to the TV. It had taken him over a thousand years to find his mate and Alec had no intention of messing it up now. Though their story had begun with hurt, they were both determined to write a better ending, and they had an eternity ahead of them to make it as perfect as could be.

#twilight #twilight fanfiction #alec volturi #alec volturi x female reader #request #jane volturi #demetri volturi #jane x demetri #aro volturi #caius volturi #so much angst in this at the start #but a fluffy end #alec is a clueless boyo and I cannot be convinced otherwise

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noodlesfluff · 4 years ago

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The Fire Nations Assassin - Zuko x fem!reader (pt.1)

SUMMARY: y/n has been raised as an assassin and has the opportunity to gain her freedom. What could go wrong? Well… turns out the person she was assigned to kill wasn’t the actual threat.

WORD COUNT: 1.8k

WARNINGS: death. Kinda gory not really but like 1 descriptive sentence about death I think? Swearing. Maybe a bit angsty? Not really. Abusive family relationship. Grammar, spelling and punctuation.

A/N: Hiya friends this is my first atla fic! Hope you like it :)) There will most likely be more parts to this idk lolol. Also! Second day in a row posting wow! We love procrastinating uni work. NEW EDIT: hi everyone! future chapters for this series WILL BE POSTED ON @noodlesfluffy !!!! This account will NOT be used for this series’ future chapters :)

also! italics = flashback

part 2

20 minutes until midday.

This is it. You completed your final mission and you would be free at last. Finally. Zemin, your wonderful guardian and boss said that the prize for today's target would give you enough gold pieces that you can finally go home. Well, you didn’t have a home. Not anymore, but anywhere away from the Fire Nation? You will gladly take it with open arms. Honestly at first you were surprised, freedom at the age of 13 seems way to easy. You didn’t know a life other than constantly fighting for the gold pieces that would pay off your debt with Zemin for raising you…but all the other assassins in the nation are still paying off their debts with their trainers. Then again, you’re the most feared assassin in the Fire Nation, and highly sought after. Even if you haven’t been on the scene for as long the others, nor do they realise you’re literally a 13-year-old girl.

You suppose that made it easier when you entered the palace in your finest robes claiming you’re the niece of the Fire Lords general. Little did the guards know, you were about to kill said uncle.

You hit another dead end.

“Fuck.” Why are there so many corridors? You know you can’t leave the way you came in, it’s too suspicious. The guards would know something is wrong. Why would you leave the palace before you got a chance to see the general, your “uncle”, before he wins his Agni Kai?

You’ve never had to enter the palace before today, nor did you ever have to really go near it. Zemin had given you a vague location of the exits, yet somehow failed to mention how stupidly big the palace was. That asshole. Normally the ones who are commissioning you to kill come from within the palace. You never know who they are, but what you do know is that you kill those who come too close to replacing them from their oh so treasured positions next to the Fire Lord. Nobel scum. Ironically, the ones you do kill are no better than them, hiding in the taverns in the middle of the night cheating on their wives. So why the hell did you have to visit the palace now.

10 minutes until midday.

This by far had to be the worst mission you have ever gone on. Turning yet another corner you try to navigate an exit leading to somewhere, anywhere out of this damned palace and as far away from the body. You knew this would’ve been a lot easier if you were given at least a day to snoop the exits but you only feel your fire rage inside you thinking about the argument you had with Zemin last night.

“What do you mean the target is in the palace?!”

Zemin being the kind and loving guardian he is, didn’t even bother to face you. “Look y/n. You have one shot to kill the general tomorrow. No later. If you miss your chance, you’re just going to have to keep doing the regular jobs. Just be grateful you have this opportunity. They specifically wanted you to do it anyway. You’re the cleanest in the game. You’re also the only one who manages to get away every time without using your bending. If I’m honest, that’s just a compliment to me.”

Scoffing you move towards him. “This is suicide! You can’t expect me to enter that palace and kill the general! I’ll get caught without time to prepare, I don’t even know what the inside of the palace is like!!”

He finally looks you in the eye, unphased. “It doesn’t matter what you want or what you know y/n. If you fail this mission, you might as well die with your freedom. There is an Agni Kai tomorrow at the palace, and it seems that whoever commissioned you to kill the general, hopes you can act as a safeguard for whoever is on the other side.”

Your heart skips a beat. “An Agni Kai?! You can’t possibly think I can get away with this! Everyone in the nation knows how binding they are. Even if I do manage to kill the general, they’ll hunt me down! I won’t make it out alive!”

Fire rages behind Zemin’s eyes, “You will make it. I have trained you for the past seven years of your life! You are the only one capable of completing this mission and you should know this! Trainers all around the nation have countless students who have died on missions you can complete in an hour. Do you know why?! Because they spread their knowledge too wide and too thin. If there is one thing my brother and I have in common its that who you pass your knowledge down to must be worthy. You are worthy Y/N. Now, sit. Lets eat, and I will give you the briefing for tomorrow. If there is one thing you must remember, it’s that you must kill the general and get out by midday, or else whoever is on the other side of that Agni Kai will most likely die. You are their only hope. I wasn’t told who it was but they must be inexperienced or stupid.”

As you stare at the painting of the general on the dining room table you know one thing is certain. They are inexperienced and stupid, especially since I’m about to die for this person.

2 minutes until midday.

In a rushed panic you follow a random group of people walking into a public area. Maybe you can blend in the crowd and find an exit before they notice that one of the participants for the Agni Kai is lying on the floor of his office with a nice and wide slit to his throat.

You almost freeze as you walk through the threshold after the group before you. Remembering the area on the awful map Zemin showed you of the palace last night, you knew this is where the Agni Kai was being held. You wanted to puke. It was almost as if the spirits were laughing at you, payback for all the lives you’ve taken. Feeling too exposed, you stand as far to the side as possible, your eyes instinctively scanning the area for any threats, weapons, and most importantly, a fucking exit.

1 minute until midday.

There it is! On the other side of the room you see an exit. This is it. You did it. Making your way as quickly around the duelling area, you almost want to bring a smile to your face. Reaching it in literal record timing, just as you’re about to walk out the door, you notice the crowd goes quiet. That doesn’t seem right. Taking one last glance behind you, you see a Fire Nation flag fall onto the duelling ground.

Midday.

“No….” you think to yourself, “that can’t be!”

You killed the general. You knew you had, you stared at the painting long enough to know you killed the right one. You never make mistakes. Ever. So why was the Agni Kai still happening? As if the spirits wanted to laugh at you in the face, you saw the Fire Lord enter from the other side of the platform. Confused you glance to who he was going to face. Why would you be sent to kill someone who was going to face the Fire Lord? Surely, he could defend himself? Holding back a gasp, it all clicks in your head. You weren’t protecting the Fire Lord from the general, you were protecting a boy about your age on the other side of the platform.

Yet this still doesn’t make sense. Why would the Fire Lord give a boy, who a guard could easily take, the time of day?

To top it all off, the boy seems just a shocked as you. “Please father, I only had the Fire Nations interests at heart. I’m sorry I spoke out of turn!”

Unaffected by his son’s words, the Fire Lord continues to move towards him. “You will fight for your honour.”

As you watch the Fire Nation Prince kneel before his father on the floor, the thought of leaving completely escapes your mind. You knew this was beyond wrong. Even after killing so many, you knew that no innocent child should have to fight for their honour. Especially since you already knew how trivial something like honour was considering how fast you lost yours in order to survive. He shouldn’t have to lose his. Not like this.

“I meant no disrespect. I am your loyal son.”

He continues to walk towards his son. “Rise and fight Prince Zuko!”

The fire inside you rises, almost like it wants to burst out of the traditional top knot on your head. This shouldn’t be happening, you had killed the general to apparently protect the prince, and titles be damned, you couldn’t bring yourself to walk out of that stupid door.

As Zuko places his arms in front of him on the floor, you knew he had no chance. “I won’t fight you!”

Slowly, and almost subconsciously you walk towards the platform as Zemin’s words ring in the back of your mind “…kill the general and get out by midday, or else whoever is on the other side of that Agni Kai will most likely die.”

You almost wanted to let out a painful laugh because it seems you killed the general for no reason at this point.

“You will learn respect, and suffering will be your teacher!” Zuko’s tear sicken face looked up to his father as if it’s his one last attempt, begging for mercy. You know it’s not enough.

“You are their only hope”

With your heart in your throat, almost feeling your body shake with fear, determination, and adrenaline all rolled into one, you leap onto the platform in front of the Prince’s body as the Fire Lord strikes. Feeling the unbearable heat of his fire on the left side of your body from your neck all the way down to your hip, you let out a scream. Soon enough, you hear Zuko’s join yours.

You want to collapse and cry all at the same time. Partially because of the pain, and partially because Zuko’s scream is the only indicator that you’re failing because he’s getting burnt too. Your mind spins as you feel yourself losing all sense of reality. Wishing the spirits would help you save a person’s life rather than taking one.

After what feels like a lifetime, it stops. Your body shaking as if its still on fire, you fall to your knees feeling paralysed. Your ears are ringing, yet you still hear a soft voice from behind you. “W-who are you?”

You sigh in relief. He’s going to be okay. Yet the moment of relief is gone as soon as it came. The Fire Lord’s voice suddenly controls the room once again. “Someone take away the traitor who dares interfere with the Agni Kai!”

Well fuck.

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unsteadyimagines · 5 years ago

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Deceitful (Spencer Reid x Reader) Part 1/2

SUMMARY: Spencer helps Amanda (a recovering victim of domestic violence rescued by the BAU) by spending time with her, which makes Y/N mad because he barely had time to spend with her originally because of his job. Now, argument after argument, Y/N has suspicions Spencer’s intentions may not be so pure after all.

WORD COUNT: 1.9k

WARNINGS: N/A

NOTE: This is my first time ever posting any of my writing so please bear with me!! I also have to thank @moonlit-martyr for giving me the motivation to start writing again!!

***Feedback is always welcome for future improvement!

-------

“Hey, Emily long time no see,” you smile, walking through the entry of the BAU, hands full with Spencer’s lunch which he had left at home early this morning.

“Hey, Y/N it’s been so long, what are you doing here?” she asks, grabbing stacks and stacks of what I assume are new case files, once again reminding me of their hectic and highly dangerous job.

“I just came to drop off Spencer’s lunch; he left it at home again this morning. Do you know where he is?” You ask curiously. Emily’s face drops slightly, but enough for me to notice her change in demeanour. She looks as if she’s struggling to come up with an answer. Being in the FBI, you’d think she would be a better liar, or at least look more convincing.

“Oh, uh – he’s, um – actually already gone out for lunch… with Amanda. They left about 25 minutes ago,” She says, looking down to the floor. My stomach twisted in nervous knots, feeling both disappointment and uneasiness.

“T-they?” You’re afraid to ask. This was the third time this week Spencer has gone out for lunch with Amanda, and while you usually wouldn’t be concerned about Spencer making new friends, in fact, you would encourage it, this time something felt… different. Amanda was a victim they rescued from a life-threatening domestic violence dispute four weeks ago. According to Spencer, she didn’t have any family or friends left due to her then abusive husband pushing her away from everyone she knew and loved. She has no one.

You let out a heavy sigh, placing Spencer’s lunch on his desk and looking back at Emily, who looks sympathetic. “I know what you’re thinking, Y/N, but this is Spencer we’re talking about. I don’t think you have anything to worry about - he adores you… you know that” She tells you reassuringly. You believe Emily’s words of comfort because deep down, you know she’s right. From the moment you and Spencer met at the college you attend when he was teaching a class, it was a match made in heaven. The two of you hit it off so quickly, getting to know each other and already planning a second meeting before even finishing your first one.

“I know I know, and I understand she doesn’t have anyone right now and I think it’s very considerate of Spencer to help her get back on her feet but… and I may sound horrible for saying this, but… I-I just hope she doesn’t try to take advantage of his kindness and mistake it for something else.”

“Remember he loves you and wouldn’t do anything to jeopardise that, Amanda just needs a little bit of guidance right now, I’m sure you can try to understand that. Being isolated from every person you love for so long by someone who is meant to be your husband, then all of a sudden have everything taken away from you. Not to mention all the physical and psychological pain she must have been feeling.” Emily explains. Maybe I sound paranoid.

You smile at Emily, grateful for her advice.

“Thanks, Emily. I’m just being paranoid. I’m sure everything is fine.” However, at this point, I don’t know who I am trying to convince more - myself or Emily.

“Do you want to come and see the others? I’m sure they would all love to see you again,” Emily encourages, trying to get my mind off of Spencer and Amanda.

Giving her an enthusiastic nod, she leads me to the group, who are smiling and laughing while awaiting another case. As Penelope’s sees me walking closer, she has a huge grin on her face and her arms already out on either side of her for a bone-crushing hug.

It’s been a considerable number of hours since I left the BAU, getting on with household chores before Spencer is due to arrive home. Putting the finishing touches on dinner, I hear the front door open and in walks Spencer in his black suit. He drops his briefcase and bag by the door, walking into the kitchen with a lazy smile written on his face. His long arms stretched out; he makes his way towards me.

“Hey babe, sorry I’m home so late. I got caught up with some last-minute case reports.” He murmurs, wrapping his arms around my waist, placing a delicate kiss on my cheek. At this point, it just feels wrong to accept his loving gestures. Did they still mean the same things from when we first met? Placing the two plates on the dining table, I sit opposite Spencer, not sure how to even talk to him. Do I bring up my concerns? He looks quite tired from work. Maybe I shouldn’t push it on him tonight? Or should I? Do I mention it at all?!

Dinner was awkward, tense and quiet all at once. Only the sounds of metal utensils and glass plates being heard in the room and soft mumbles of delight from Spencer for the food. Spencer sits back and lets out a deep sigh.

“Do you mind clearing up? I still have heaps of work to get done before I go in tomorrow.” He asks, however, I get the sense that it doesn’t matter whether I say yes or no, I will still end up doing it.

“Sure, you go do what you need to.” I get up, grabbing both plates and begin cleaning up for the night. A half-hour later I make my way upstairs to get ready for bed and as always, I pass Spencer’s office. Except this time, I stop in my tracks and take a look inside and once again my stomach is filled with nerves and butterflies, but not the good kind. It’s funny how Spencer has ‘heaps’ of work to get done, yet he’s finding time to message back and forth with whoever he was talking to, and of course, it only took me a second to realise who it most likely was. Smiling and chuckling at his screen was a clear indication it was most definitely not someone from the team, but Amanda.

I desperately want to ask him about her, but I’m not ready to hear the answer. Spencer is the only serious relationship I have ever had, the only person I’ve ever loved. But this isn’t what love is meant to feel like. Feeling constantly on edge, anxious and paranoid. At this point, I’m not certain its paranoia anymore, but my gut feeling. I don’t want to believe that Spencer may be cheating on me. I can’t. I can’t stand this anymore. I make my way over to our bathroom and get ready for bed, leaving room for Spencer when he eventually comes to bed.

I suddenly feel a nudge on my arm. Slowly opening my eyes, I see Spencer’s face hovering over mine in the darkness. 2:25 am.

“What are you doing up still? I thought you would’ve come to bed hours ago.” I groggily ask, trying to make out his features in the lack of light. But I don’t need any light to notice how unconvincing his next words are, and once again, it sends my heart beating profusely.

“I just got called into work, but I should only be gone a couple of hours this time, I promise.” Promise. The word promise is used a lot by him and yet lately, he never fails to disappoint me. I promise I’ll be home early. I promise we’ll get to spend more time together. I promise we can make this work - I promise, I promise, I promise.

Having nothing to say to him, I simply roll over and try to get back to sleep. I hear him let out a sigh.

“I love you” He whispers. That alone threatens tears to brim my eyes. As much as I am hurting right now, I couldn't not say it back.

“I love you too, be safe.” I barely whisper, loud enough for him to hear. In a way, him hearing me say those words makes me hope he feels somewhat guilty if he isn’t actually going to work, but another woman’s house. Her house. But no, of course not. Instead, I hear him pick up his bag, walk downstairs and lock the door.

Sitting up in bed, my thoughts are running a million miles an hour. Where did we go wrong? Did I do something? Does he not love me anymore despite him saying he does? It takes me hours before I am able to go back to sleep, considering waiting up for Spencer to return home but deciding against it.

Opening my heavy eyes, I check to see the time is now 8:30 am. I also notice Spencer’s side of the bed remains untouched. A couple of hours, huh? Around 45 minutes later, I’m sat on the couch engrossed in a book, when Spencer walks in the door - clothes dishevelled and tired eyes. “Hi babe” He yells, walking up the stairs to our bedroom before I am even able to reply.

When he comes downstairs, he sits next to me, wrapping his arms around my shoulders, enveloping me in a warm hug and a kiss on the corner of my mouth. Fuck, I miss this. I hum in delight, taking whatever I can get, which sounds as pathetic as it actually is.

“You said you would only be a couple of hours, not over 6 hours.” You murmur in his chest.

“I know, I’m sorry I just got caught up with the others. Next time I’ll let you know if I run over time.” He assures me. Looking up at him, I can tell he is tired, small bags forming under his eyes. He gives me a lazy smile, pecking me on the forehead before heading upstairs.

“I thought we were going to hang out today? We’ve barely had any alone time together this week or last week,” I asked, turning around on the couch to look at him. He’s only made it halfway up the stairs as he looks at me, groans and looks up at the ceiling.

“Y/N, I’m tired. We can hang out tonight or tomorrow.” He huffs, continuing his way up the stairs.

“Will we though? Because that’s what you said a few days ago, and numerous times last week.” You blurt. It’s not my intention to start an argument today, but if it means I can finally get something out of him instead of endless false hope, then so be it.

Spencer’s face contorts in an annoyed expression, a slight glare in his eyes draining into mine.“Y/N, don’t argue with me. I’m tired and I want to sleep. We’ll hang out later.” He says more firmly. But to me, that isn’t good enough.

“It’s always ‘later’ with you isn’t it?” I push.

“For fuck sakes Y/N we can hang out later!” He yells, his arms flailing up in annoyance. I flinch slightly, taken aback by his sudden change in mood. For however long we’ve been together I don’t think he has ever really raised his voice at me before like he had just now. Sinking into the couch, I succumb to his angry and irritated mood.

“I- okay, sorry.” He didn’t look the least bit apologetic, trudging back up the stairs and into our bedroom. Hot tears slide down my cheeks, my throat tightens as I try to hold down my sobs. I don’t know whether I’m meant to stay here or leave. But where would I go? Deciding on staying on the couch for the time being, I curl up into a ball and shut my eyes, trying to sleep the day away and avoid any more drama.

#spencer reid #criminal minds #dr spencer reid #dr spencer reid fic #dr spencer reid fics #criminal minds fic #criminal minds fics #spencer reid x you #spencer reid x y/n #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid y/n #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid gif #spencer reid gifs #spencer reid fics #spencer reid fic

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alexalblondo · 4 years ago

Note

You can ignore this if you want and maybe I'm just a bit sensitive to it as someone who is Asian but I feel like Alex is treated more harshly than other people who's been in his position no matter what Alex's success is always reduced and undermined and all his mistakes are highlighted i can't help but feel like there's definitely some kind of racial issue there but like I said I might be just sensitive

Hello friend 💕

Sorry, this took a moment, I was watching the press conference and this is a question I really wanna focus on getting right cause it deserves it!

First of all: I agree 100%! Obviously there are other factors as play but I think - just like with Lewis - there is racism at play here!

(I hope it’s okay to compare these two situations but they ARE the only noticable non white men on the grid and I think it shows cause you don’t have people tweeting about, Idk what’s a stereotype, how the french always give up every time Esteban has to let Daniel pass, I guess - yet you get ten comments about Alex going back to his soup kitchen in Asia every time he isn’t perfect)

Second: never feel like you’re being too sensitive by pointing out something like this! The worst that can happen is a person disagreeing with you and having a valid reason for why what they are saying wasn’t racially motivated - but you’d still have made them aware of a possible bias or of how they phrase something the wrong way ... the best that can happen is you figure out someone in your life is a racist and you can cut them out!

Third: in my opinion there are three factors at play when it comes to the media being more harsh on Alex: RBRs history, Pierre ... and racism!

1) RBRs history is easy enough to explain, they have a history of dropping drivers if they underperform (Pierre most recently) or if someone in Torro Rosso was performing better (Daniil) (Except how that argument never made sense here cause there wasn’t someone to be promoted in Alex’s place, sooo)

2) I should preface this by saying I like Pierre. I think he’s a great driver and his story and the way he seemingly rebuilt himself to be stronger both as a person and a driver is more than impressive and I am proud of him and happy for him, but, you know, sometimes it gets a bit much, sometimes people are ... I don’t wanna say they are complimenting him too much but Daniil has had similar results for a lot of the season and you don’t hear people constantly praise him, you know?

(Like Imola, yes, his P4 was impressive but people talked about him afterwards like he had lead the race and then DNFed in the last corner and just, nope, no hate to Pierre but we don’t know what he could have done in the race)

And that’s what I mean with the Pierre-factor cause on the one hand side we have Pierre doing so good in Alpha Tauri ... and on the other hand side we have Alex seemingly underperforming at RedBull, making people go: ohhh, Pierre is sooo amazing why did ya’ll replace him switch them back (- instead of saying: huh, maybe there is team fuckery happening ... but ya know 🙄)

I don’t wanna put ANY achievements Pierre has made down but it really annoys me the way people bring him doing well up so often while talking about Alex when that shouldn’t really be a factor cause they are not in fact in the same team and the same car (and maybe I am just doing the same thing I criticize in others, which I’m sorry for but it was to make a point)

3) and then we come to your factor and a factor that I have noticed as well which is: ✨racism✨

Now, I cannot talk about potential micro aggressions and I don’t notice everything cause I would be more of a Scarlett Johansson type of asian than you, I guess, and while I grew up with tolerent open minded NON RACIST people, the austrian-baverian border lands are not particularly multi-cultural and usually people aren’t aware of structures like racism if they benefit them, tbh, so that’s more of your part (I also don’t feel particularly comfortable commenting on this part cause, ya know, Scarlett here 🙈)

But the part that I did notice and the part that I do consider racism and the part that pisses me off to no end is: EVERYTIME SOMEONE SAYS THEY THINK ALEX WILL KEEP HIS SEAT THEY SHOEHORN IN A REFERENCE TO THE FACT THAT HIS MOTHER IS THAI AND REDBULL IS 51% THAI OWNED

Whew, sorry for screaming!

It’s just - the only OTHER PERSON they mention his sponsoring so much with is Lance Stroll who’s father LITTERALLY owns about half of Racing Point! (again, not meant against Lance)

Like, you don’t hear people say Seb only got the seat at Aston Martin cause his wife is part-british or Esteban only got the Renault seat cause he is french or hear people mention that Lando is both british and his dad bought into McLaren and that’s why he is at McLaren

But with Alex it’s constant! I don’t know about Sky UK or any other but there isn’t a single session at Sky Germany that doesn’t point this fact out at least once, cause, Idk, we don’t remember the last 15 times?

Yeah.

Okay, I’m gonna stop here cause this is super long already and I just realised I didn’t particularly go into what you mean, but I just wanna say: I agree. I think he is criticised more cause he isn’t white.

Anyways, apologize for the long ass post and I won’t reread it, so sorry for all mistakes, I’ll probably edit it like 5 times in the next hour though!

Thank you though, for coming to me to talk about this and I hope I didn’t say anything horrible!

(Reason #4 btw is that Alex being shy and awkward and nice means we don’t hear him complain as much or as dramatic as, well, his teammate which makes people think it isn’t that bad and also makes them miss that he just voiced something was wrong)

(Which is a really dumb thing but Sky Germany keeps pointing out how ... unenthusiastic and quiet Alex is on the radios so yeah)

Anyways: If your still reading have a fantastic night and do something that makes you happy!!!!

#f1 #alex albon #like I think the media is so racist when it comes to alex but I just ... cant’t really pinpoint it on anything but the owner thing an ya #I’ll shut up now though #no ask tag just vibes #sorry for the long ass post

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firefly-in-darkness · 4 years ago

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Galaxy Princess - 1/3

Characters → Y/N & Peter Quill, Mentions of other Marvel characters.

Summary → After the birth of superheroes, several alien attacks and the blip, you were pretty much ready for anything. That was until you met Peter Quill. He burst into your life at lightning speed and nothing could have prepared you for the way he turned your world upside down.

Word Count → 3k

Warnings → Swearing, later warnings; 18+ Smut, Fluff.

Series Taglist → OPEN - send an ask.

Beta → @princessmisery666 // all mistakes are my own.

A/N → Should have posted this at half 7 but everything seemed to go wrong BUT it’s here now... This is for @crushedbyhyperbole - I am so sorry that this is months late to your challenge! [Prompt: To the moon and back - in Part 3]. And I actually have a schedule for the release for this 3-parter… This is GOTG Vol1&2 Peter Quill set in a post-Endgame world.

Return to: Series List // Marvel List

That Friday feeling was in the spring of Y/N’s step, and how she threw off her stuffy office clothes and traded them for baggy top and sweatpants. It was in the way she put on her favourite playlist, shimmied a pizza in the oven and how she shut the fridge with a pop of her hip. She twirled around the kitchen in between sips of beer, lifting her spirits higher and higher.

At the sound of the oven alarm beeping, she plated up the pizza, walked through her apartment, and flopped a blanket over her shoulder in preparation for her Friday night tradition. It had been a hard week at work, and she couldn’t wait to unwind in one of her favourite spots.

She climbed out of the lounge window onto the fire escape, ascending the steps carefully as to not drop her pizza and beer.

“Careful out there, Y/N,” Stan, her neighbour, said.

She paused at the window ledge and grinned back at the elderly gentleman sitting in his armchair. He looked over the top of his glasses with a fond smile.

“I’m always careful Stan,” She winked and carried on with her climb.

On the rooftop, overlooking the countryside in the distance, Y/N could relax and get away from work. She’d been a temporary administrator at a financial company for six months, but she didn’t seem to fit in with any of her colleagues. She soon discovered that she was often talked about because she was different. ‘Different’ meant Y/N didn't join them for the weekly drinks at the local bar or partake in office gossip. None of it was her thing and, to them, that made her ‘weird.’

On many occasions, Y/N had overheard them guessing about her private life and it took its toll after hearing the same repetitive comments; she never talks about her family. Or friends for that matter. She needs to get laid. She's a bit of a freak. Too wrapped up in all that alien abduction and sci-fi nonsense.

And that’s how being on the rooftop, with pizza and a couple of beers, became a weekly tradition and a place of solitude. Unwinding with music and the starry sky above, Y/N could pretend the world below didn’t exist.

The mellow music drowned out the noise from the street below as she stretched out on the sun lounger. A contented sigh left her mouth as the blanket enveloped her in comfort and the warmth seeped into her bones.

The sun setting over the woodland in the distance was the perfect backdrop for her to relax as she munched on the pizza. Y/N adored the way the peach glow filled the skyline and silhouetted the trees against the horizon.

The greasy delight helped to soothe her but couldn’t quiet all the gossip she’d heard about herself that week. Especially the remarks about her sex life. They had no idea if there was any truth to their assumptions, but no amount of beer or delicious food could drown the thought completely.

Over the last couple of years, Y/N had pretended that she was happy. That she was content with being on her own but deep down she had given up. Her inability to navigate the dating scene successfully was not something she was proud of but then again,��she’d had too many awful and lame experiences to count.

She was a moon without an orbit, drifting in an endlessly dark sky. It was as if everyone else had been given access to this world of love and relationships and she was left alone. She couldn’t recall the last time she felt wanted or needed and it tugged at her chest.

Her wall of denial had crumbled, and the hot tears slid down her cheeks. She’d been lonely, had been for a while, but when other people noticed, it stung more than she liked.

The bright sky faded to navy, the stars flickering on in anticipation of lighting the night sky. Y/N longed for whatever was beyond the Earth’s atmosphere, up where those stars sparkled even brighter.

Y/N had always dreamed of being somewhere else. She felt as if she didn’t belong here that she was destined for more than a mundane office job and daydreaming of the world beyond the solar system. One day, somehow, she knew she’d fly away from this place and find somewhere that she belonged.

A bright flash streaked across the sky, a shooting star. Y/N grinned, shuffling to the edge of her seat, ready to make her wish. Until she realised the light was getting bigger. Her eyes widened as she watched the flaming ball crash into the woodland in the distance.

Y/N scrambled to her feet; the blanket was forgotten until she fell to the ground. Knees scraping against the concrete. The tangled fabric was pushed away, and she gingerly rolled up her sweatpants; luckily, it was only a scrape, nothing to worry about.

She jumped up, grabbed her phone, and rushed down the fire escape. Once inside, she slid on her fluffy socks along the hardwood floor then hopped around to put her sneakers on while trying to grab her backpack. Luckily, she made it out without an accident.

Minutes later she was navigating the roads to the woodlands, her body hummed with adrenaline and her mind raced with wonder; what was it? A meteor? A spaceship? Aliens? Oh shit. What if it weren’t friendly? What if the Avengers showed up? She wasn’t sure she cared as she swerved the car off the road and into the empty parking lot, kicking up gravel and dust. This was an opportunity she wouldn’t let pass her by.

Y/N eagerly dived out of the car, made sure her sneakers were laced and her phone was in her pocket and jogged up the main path to the woodland. Before long, her clammy skin began sticking to her cardigan. She pulled it off and wrapped it around her waist. Her eagerness to get to the crash site and all the possibilities of what it could be, she hadn’t realised how far off the beaten path she was.

The moon was her only source of light, but the towering trees made it seem as if it were playing hide and seek on the ground. She put on her phone’s flashlight, her heart racing as she stumbled along the less maintained route.

Her eyes slowly adjusted to the darkness as the flashlight remained trained on the ground. Nerves bubbled in her stomach and her legs began to shake as she neared the potential landing site.

A faint orange glow flickered against the tree trunks, the air thick and sticky with fumes. Y/N picked up her pace, approaching the smoke that billowed from the wreckage and the flames licking at the grass. Light and ash that spit out from the chewed-up metal.

She raised her arm, shielding her eyes from the bright glare so she could access the wreckage. It wasn’t any kind of spaceship she’d seen before. It didn’t look like the ones from the attack on New York or reported after The Blip. It was small, could fit one adult at most.

A groan rang out nearby and she whipped around to see a man, a human man, fall to the floor a few meters away. In a flash, she landed on her knees, pain shooting through the already damaged skin, and rolled the person over, pulling at the red leather jacket.

Y/N placed her cheek near their face and relaxed when she felt their light breath caressing her skin. Her fear subsided, and she was finally able to look at the man, her heart fluttered at his rugged look; the stubble scattered across his jawline, a gash across his cheek and his fluffy dirty blond hair.

The crackle of the flames and the metal whining behind caught her attention again. She hauled him away from the ship, afraid they were in danger of being burnt. After a few tugs, she fell backwards onto her bottom. Another groan came from the man below her and she hoped she hadn’t hurt him. She looked down at the handsome spaceman, his head rising from her lap with a deep frown and eyes scrunching with confusion.

“Hi,” Y/N spoke softly, hoping not to alarm him.

He shuffled slightly, trying to turn and brace his hand on the ground but gripped her thigh. She watched the realisation dawn on his face, he looked up at her and back down between her legs, a huge grin across his face, “Well this isn’t a first.”

Y/N shoved him backwards and scrambled away.

He planted his arms to avoid face planting the ground and turned to the wreckage. “What the hell- Oh man, look at this,” He jumped to his feet and began inspecting and discarding chunks of metal and wires. “No, no, no!”

Y/N was frozen to the spot, her thoughts blank as she watched the man dash around the wreckage, throwing items over his shoulder in obvious frustration.

After a moment, she stood up and raised her arms in defence. “Maybe you should sit down, you did just crash landed.”

“I need to get back to my ship.”

He may have looked human, but if he had a spaceship, he clearly wasn’t. Oh shit, I’m talking to an alien.

“I can help,” she stuttered before clearing her throat, willing herself to not sound so defenceless or unsure. “But please don’t hurt me,” She pleaded.

He stopped mid-throw, the mangled metal hovering over his shoulder, and twisted on the balls of his feet to look at her. His piercing blue eyes alert, an exaggerated gape in his mouth before he spoke, “I’m not going to hurt you, you turd blossom.”

Y/N blinked at his insult, uncertain how to process being called a turd blossom. He walked towards her and she stepped backwards as he grew closer until her back was against a tree. He rested his arm above her head, leaning against the trunk, a cheeky grin forming on his face.

“So, I’m a little stuck and need a little help with contacting my ship.”

Y/N shoved him away, “Your smoldering isn’t going to work on me.”

“Smoldering?! I was not smoldering.” He stuttered and held up a mangled item that looked like a walkie talkie. “Do you have anything that can help fix this or a way I can contact my ship so I can get off this crappy planet?”

Y/N paced back and forth, she wasn’t sure what to say or do, her mouth opened and closed. Of course, she had a radio back at her apartment, but she wasn't going to let a stranger into her home. Y/N knew it was crazy, but she had to help him. She spun around and pointed at him, he looked from side to side as if looking for someone else.

“Yes, you! I will take you somewhere that has a radio. But no funny business.”

He crossed his heart, dramatically and she rolled her eyes. “Follow me.” She spun on her heels, “Are you coming or - what’s your name?”

He jogged up to Y/N’s side and matched her speed, “Starlord.”

She paused, mid-step, chuckling, “Is that your name?”

“Yes! I’m a famous outlaw.” His brows furrowed and his jaw set.

“A famous outlaw that calls people turd blossoms,” she chuckled, “what are you wanted for, crappy insults?”

He scoffed and from the corner of her eye she noticed him smirk though he sounded offended, “a whole list of things that if you knew about, you’d be shocked.”

“Got it, you're a real bad guy, Starlord.”

This time he really was offended, “do you have a better name?”

She snickered and couldn’t help herself, “Galaxy Princess.”

He laughed loudly up at the sky, “I like you Galaxy Princess,” he admitted.

She dropped her head to watch her feet and tried to stifle the happy grin that wanted to break out on her face.

One short car journey filled with awkward silence later, they were in Y/N’s apartment, and inside the box room. A desk and computer on one side, the opposite wall filled with pictures, newspaper clippings and maps of Earth and the solar system. Embarrassment tingled on Y/N’s cheeks as she began to clear the mess of takeout containers and used coffee cups that were on her desk.

The radio unit was pulled forward and she passed the mouthpiece to him. Noting how dazed he was by all the assorted items in the room, picking them up and inspecting them as he’d never seen a tablet or Bluetooth speaker before. Then she remembered, alien. His technology was far more advanced.

“Here, if your spaceship is in our atmosphere it should pick up this signal.” Y/N flicked at the switches and turned the dials; white noise unleashed into the room until it went almost silent apart from a faint buzz.

Starlord stared at the equipment and muttered under his breath, “I can’t believe that I actually wish Rocket was here.”

Y/N ignored the comment, he hadn’t wanted her to hear what he’d said, “Do you know what frequency your ship uses or anything that would help connect to the comms unit?”

“Of course, I know what frequency my ship uses.” He stepped around her and started to fiddle with the dials, white noise filling the room once more. He winked and gave her a lopsided grin, like the one earlier when his face was in her lap. “It’s my ship. I know the frequency. Yep.”

To save Starlord the embarrassment of having no clue, Y/N turned her focus to the broken device he had brought with him. Metal scratched, wires exposed and broken. With enough technical knowledge, she realised it was more of a transmitter than a radio.

“I think I might be able to fix this, but I don’t have anything that resembles these parts.” Y/N didn’t realise he was right behind her and bumped into him with a surprised yelp.

“Woah there!” He steadied her with his hands on her arms, “Didn’t mean to make you jump,” he said as she turned to face him. She felt the blush spread over her cheeks and he smiled, “Unless you did that on purpose. Considering you like my smoldering,” he winked.

“I didn’t say I liked your smoldering, I said it wouldn’t work on me.”

Y/N hoped that he didn’t have superpowers otherwise he’d hear the pounding of her heart but what unnerved her more than his proximity, was that she couldn’t work out if she was scared or captivated. It was definitely the latter. His thumbs rubbed softly and sparked a shiver. Her thoughts caught back up to her and she led them into the kitchen and grabbed the first aid kit off the shelf.

“So how did you end up in an escape pod?” She asked, moving into the lounge.

“Ha. I don’t think you’ve got time for the long story,” he said as she perched on the couch. “So, I’ll give you the short version.” He joined her and reclined back into the cushions.

“I’m happy with either,” Y/N offered, turning to face him, with an acute awareness of her knee brushing against his thigh. “May I?”

Starlord glanced down, noticing their closeness and her fiddling with the box. His chest inflated, proud and a smug smile; he was eager to let her tend to his wounds and talk of his heroism and escape from evil.

He cleared his throat before sinking further into the couch, “I’m more than willing to oblige a beautiful woman with my stories, sweetheart.”

Y/N snorted and began to clean the gash on his cheek while he explained how his crew’s mission hadn’t gone to plan. It was supposed to be simple; get on the spaceship and pick up the wanted person then to collect the bounty. Y/N watched him tell the story in between winces of the antiseptic wipe; the way his eyes lit up as he retold the plan and mentioned his companions; Rocket and Groot.

She wanted to know more but she was distracted by his animated expressions. Gosh, he’s handsome, Y/N blushed at her thoughts, “will you stop moving. I can’t fix this if you don’t hold still.”

Y/N was grateful for him not seeing the embarrassment and refrained from moving erratically so she could apply the butterfly stitches. He continued with how he hadn’t expected the spaceship to have a bunch of Kree and Sakaarans on board. She bounced in her seat, the excitement taking over at the mention of the alien races.

Starlord chuckled at her enthusiasm, “I’ll tell you more about them bastards later. The escape pod was my only option, but it malfunctioned after it took several hits from the attack shuttles.”

Y/N clamped a hand over her mouth, in fear and amazement that he’d managed to land it somewhat safely and without extensive injury. She felt shy under Starlord’s scrutiny and the way he was likely to judge the brightness in her eyes, the intrigue she had for life beyond earth.

“Now I’m stranded on Earth and have no way of communicating with my crew back on the Milano.” He shrugged his shoulders, “Luckily I had a beautiful woman come to my rescue.”

Y/N pretended not to hear those words as the weight of the night’s events hit her suddenly and she tried to stifle the yawn, “Sorry, can we have a look at this in the morning?”

“Sure.” His bright smile dropped a fraction, he recovered it but not in time for her to miss.

Spare bedding was placed on the sofa and Y/N directed him around the apartment, “The shower is just down the hall. If you can’t sleep, here’s the tv remote and help yourself to food.”

“Thank you, Princess.”

“Goodnight, Starlord.”

“It’s Peter.” His cheeky smile had faded to something softer.

“Y/N. Goodnight Peter.”

“Sweet dreams, Y/N.” He laid down and continued to wave until she shut the bedroom door.

Y/N was too tired to process that she was leaving a stranger on his own, in her home. There was an odd comfort from his determination to get back to his ship and crew; the place he belonged.

To Be Continued...

Everything Taglist: @reann-loves-sebstan / @aroyaldarknessblr / @thefridgeismybestie / @kitkatd7

Marvel Taglist: @natasha-danvers / @musesforart

Series Taglist: @justagirlinafandomworld

#Peter Quill x Reader #Peter Quill #Starlord x Reader #Starlord #Peter Quill Fic #Starlord Fic #Guardians of the Galaxy #Guardians of the Galaxy Fic #GOTG #gotg fic

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lady-of-all-cards · 4 years ago

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Ikemen Revolution: Headcanon - When the Red Army Officers Fall Ill

Fandom: Ikemen Revolution Characters: Lancelot Kingsley, Jonah Clemence, Edgar Bright, Kyle Ash, Zero Pairings: N/A Summary: One day, an officer falls ill with a terrible cold. Will they suffer through their work? Or hide away in their blankets until the sickness passes?

Notes: Did I depress you enough with the last two posts? Well here is a little fun happy times to forget that I did that, because I’m not that morbid or depressing (most of the time, anyway). So, I hope this cheers the blog up a little! And of course, I hope you enjoy ^-^

1. The King of Hearts - Lancelot Kingsley

Lancelot is commonly ill due to his constant use of magic leading to his overexertion.

Kyle is also in on this little tidbit, so dealing with a sick Lancelot isn’t too much for him to do, especially if it’s a common cold.

But being the kind and protective man he is, Lancelot wouldn’t tell anyone of his cold as to not worry them, because this man is a considerate teddy bear!

However, our dear Gentle Demon, Edgar Bright, is far too attentive to detail, and over their early morning meeting, picks up on Lancelot’s drousiness and general unawareness of the situation around him.

Of course, to cause chaos as he usually does, he brings it up in the conversation.

Jonah goes into panic mode, fussing over Lancelot and trying to get him to, at the very least, tell them his aliments so they can help.

Zero steps forward silently and places a crimson lolipop in front of Lancelot on the desk, stepped back sheepishly.

Lancelot takes the lolipop, but doesn’t eat it.

Yet. He’ll sneak it later when Mr.Overprotective-Mother-Jonah isn’t around

Kyle finally decides to pipe up, urging Lancelot to take even an hour’s rest before continuing with his duties.

Lancelot, of course, denies that he needs that, and tries to continue the meeting they were having before.

But it’s four against one.

Jonah would back down with a single command.

Edgar would back down, but he would continously tease him about it for days to come.

Kyle wasn’t backing down. As his personal doctor, his duty was to ensure the king was in good health at every possible moment.

Zero wouldn’t back down either. He’d much rather be ill himself that see Lancelot struggling with any sickness.

And so, Lancelot is forced to yeild. Jonah and Edgar split his paperwork, supposedly an hour’s worth of it.

Zero takes up Jonah’s and Edgar’s duties in training their units.

Kyle drags Lancelot back to his room and settles him down to sleep, giving him cold medicine and painkillers.

However, when he wakes, he realises a number of things:

1. He wasn’t woken after an hour, but was left to rest for three.

2. The entirety of his paperwork for the entire day had been done by Jonah and Edgar in the hours he slept.

Although ashamed about having to rely on his subordiantes so much, Lancelot was endeared by their kindness, and awarded them all with gifts of their favourite choosing.

2. The Queen of Hearts - Jonah Clemence

Much like Lancelot, Jonah will try to hide the fact that he’s ill, but his first mistake happens before he even wakes up…

He overslept… by an entire hour.

His sickness had hit and weakened him sometime during the night, when he opted for thinner night clothes, not expecting the chilling cold after such a comfortingly warm day.

Because of this poor judgement, Jonah’s body refused to wake up, and instead of his usual 6 AM start, he roused from his slumber at 7AM, much to his shock and distain.

It was just his luck there wasn’t a morning meeting that day due to Edgar being called away on business, and Kyle had his usual hangover, so Jonah had a moment to gather himself and actually make him presentable.

He did a good job of hiding it, but only because he stayed in his private quarters completing paperwork and eating sweet deserts that his footmen brought. There was absolutely no need whatsoever for him to leave his room.

Or so he though…

Night had passed over Cradle when he had been called to the King’s office. Edgar had gotten home slightly earlier than usual, and so the morning’s meeting had been called into place.

It seemingly wouldn’t have been a problem if the sun had been seeping through the windows, but in the glow of the Magic Crystals, Jonah’s ghostly features were illuminated fully.

At first, neither Lancelot or Edgar commented on it, opting to leave him be. It was just to late at night to be teasing…

But then… Jonah’s speech began to warp.

His sickness had progressed into a headache, and he began not thinking straight, no longer possessing the ability to rationally organise and explain his points.

However, knowing the proud Queen of Hearts would never forgive himself for ruining a meeting in such a manner, Lancelot brought the meeting to an end early, ordering his Jack and Queen straight to bed.

The next morning after a much needed sleep, Jonah woke up to painkillers and cold medicine on the bedside, with notes from his fellow officers:

Lancelot: “I noticed you were feeling off yesterday. You are given leave for as long as you need to recover. Get well soon :)”

Edgar: “Don’t push yourself, Queen. I don’t was to tease you if you’re not up to being teased.”

Kyle: “Kinda annoyed you didn’t come to me straight away. Take 10ml of medicine in the bottle three times a day and one before bed, and the painkillers once a day when you feel is necissary. And please, for the love of god, please rest.”

Zero: “Edgar told me you were sick. Don’t worry about your duties, me and him had split them while you get better, so just relax. And… here’s a lolipop. A treat from me for when you feel better!”

Although embarrassed at being caught and annoyed at some of the comments, Jonah smiled and decided that maybe it was time to take a day off to recover.

3. The Jack of Hearts - Edgar Bright

The Jack of Hearts never gets sick. EVER.

Or so it seemed, because like most things in life, Edgar Bright was an expert in the art of both faking a sickness to get a day off, and in the art of pretending not to be sick, even though he felt like literal death inside.

It was the latter that ailed him.

For the entire day, he managed to allude detection. He cleared his mind before meetings, and switched training his soliders with one of Zero’s patrols.

Everything was fine and dandy, golden, good to go!

Until that evening, his dear student had challenged him to a duel…

See, Zero found it strange that Edgar skipped on training the new recruits that day because, although he was tough and the sessions always ended in a high workload for their doctor, it was a necessary part to strengthening their resolve.

Plus… Edgar loved playfully torturing and teasing the men of the Red Army, and did it at every chance he got.

So why not this time…?

To any onlooker (and there were quite a few), it appeared to be an even match between two high-skilled soldiers, ending in Zero disarming Edgar.

But there was no teasing.

There was no indication Edgar was truly Edgar.

But during the little sparring match, Zero found it noticably easy to defeat his teacher.

Assuming he would get teased by it to fuel Edgar’s entertainment, Zero played along with it, hoping he’d snap back to his old self real quick.

But the teasing never came…

And so Zero went to the only man who he knew could solve this problem: one Master Kyle Ash.

So, Kyle and Zero innocently dined with Edgar at dinner that night. End of story.

Or so Edgar thought.

He thought he had been in the clear that night as he walked to feed the Creek Family one last meal, but the Creeks were all sat around a small handkerchief, bearing medicine for Edgar, with a small card folded ontop.

“Get well soon, papa - the Creeks.”

It was Zero’s handwriting, he’d recognise it anywhere, but the sentiment still forced a goofy smile to his face as he reached over to pet each duck in to.

Being sick wasn’t so bad, he thought…

4. The Seven of Hearts - Kyle Ash

The first thought Kyle had when he woke up that morning was that he had a hangover.

A totally reasonable conclusion to make, unless he was just so used to waking up with hangovers that it had become normal for him to assume that’s what his ailment was.

And everyone else assumed that also upon seeing him that morning at the breakfast table and during the morning meeting.

However, there was one who’d know the Hungover Doctor too long to be fooled by the effects of a hangover.

Lancelot had slipped Edgar a note during the meeting, and using the cover up of delievering a letter, let the Jack fulfill the true duty he intended.

Kyle never suspected a thing, too busy with his hangover and with his work to bother too much with his cold.

But when he had returned to his personal quarters than night to do some extra studying, he found a small collection of medicines and medicinal herbs, with a small note folded into a card.

“Do you even realise it yourself, Kyle? You’re sick, and I’m not just refering to your hangovers. Take 10ml of this medicine three times a day and one before bed, and you have leave to rest and recover. Try not to get intoxicated while you do so, it would help your recovery - Lancelot.”

He hadn’t noticed until then, but he was feeling drousy, he was sniffling every now and then, a cough stratched at his throat too.

And yet he smiled, knowing the Lance he knew was still kicking about, there to stand by the people of Cradle whenever, wherever.

5. The Ace of Heart - Zero

Much like most of the boys in the RA, he’d try to hide it and continue with his usual business

His exclusion from the crimson bloodline meant that no one really paid too close attention to him, or noticed there was anything wrong.

Thinking he got away from it all, Zero doesn’t let something as simple as a cold hold him back.

However, in the blistering Cradle heat that came around the next, he began to falter.

He developed a fever when he was out training his men, and it quickly grew worse and worse with time, as he failed to attend to it.

His men finally picked up on his daze, and after their schedual came to an end, ran off to get Kyle.

In the infirmary was both Kyle and Edgar, and upon hearing the Ace was unwell, they both rushed to his room to check the damage.

Kyle was, of course, muttering curses about it, annoyed he let it go that far.

On arriving, however, they find Zero passed out over his desk, and after a quick check-up from Kyle, Edgar carries him to the infirmary for treatment.

The next morning, when Zero wakes up in the infirmary feeling a lot better than he did yesterday, he cursed his inefficientness, and tries to leave to get back to work.

But it’s King’s orders.

Zero isn’t leaving until he’s all better! The care behind the order made Zero smile as he secretly snacked on a lolipop...

#ikemen revolution #lancelot kingsley #jonah clemence #edgar bright #kyle ash #zero #sickness

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where-theres-smoak-2 · 4 years ago

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Riverdale 5x08 Thoughts

So usually I would write a review for an episode where I go really in depth and analyse everything that happened in the episode, give you all some of my theories for next but to be honest I just don’t have the energy for that. I thought after a couple of days processing everything and giving the episode a rewatch I would be able to but nope. So instead here are just some thoughts and opinions on the episode. Again just my own opinions I am sure there will be some out there who disagree and that is fine. Also there are spoilers.

1) So I didn’t like this episode and a large, well to be honest nearly all of that was because of the writing. The writing in this episode wasn’t their best and made me dislike so many of the characters, I mean they were all doing things that just seemed really random and out of the blue and I think the reason why it felt this way is because it was too rushed and these were character arcs that should have spread across several episodes but were instead crammed into well not even one episode really, it was more like half an episode. I just feel like in the first half the episode nothing really happened and then the second half everything happened which was really jarring. Overall too many storylines in this episode just felt rushed and alot of them just didn’t make sense.

2) Ok so the key party was way too hyped up for what it was. It had the potential to be soo much more interesting than it was. I mean it lasted no time at all and not much really happened I mean half the characters walked out and the other left with the people they came with. The most interesting thing that happened was the kiss between Reggie and Fangs. I also find it kind of funny that this was a key party and yet the only people who actually end up sleeping together is Eric and Minerva, off screen but its still heavily implied. I just think that the writers hyped this up to be some big dramatic scene and then nothing really happened. And like even within the show Cheryl really hyped the key party up, with all that talk about throwing some chaos at it, and it’ll be a sexual switcheroo, one last night of wanton abandonment to remind them of their youth and yup literally nothing happened. If I had written this scene I actually would have had Eric go first and pull Minerva’s key to set up the fun vibe. Then followed with Reggie to keep that oh this is kind of fun vibe going. Then I would have had Betty pull Archie’s key first or rather instead of Veronica pulling it. Then maybe Kevin could have made some kind of comment or joke about how Betty and Archie have already been hooking up, then Veronica could seem shocked and question them about it, which leads to Chad accusing her of being jealous of Archie and still having feelings for Archie, which leads to Archie standing up for Veronica and telling Chad to leave her alone, which leads to Betty asking Archie if he has feelings for Veronica. They could also have then ended the scene with Jughead drunkenly deciding to pick a key because he just can’t deal with this drama right now which interrupts all the arguments and leaves everything between all those couples unresolved at the key party which could then lead into those scenes that followed. It would have been more dramatic and tense but would still have lead to the same place if that’s where the writers really felt they wanted to go though I have my own opinions on that too.

3) Kevin. Oh Kevin I just, I don’t know what was going on with him this episode. I mean the opening was shocking, I do think the writers wrote that well, it did kind of send you for a loop and wonder what the hell Kevin was doing, because it did look like a was cheating on Fangs but then later we get the reveal that they are actually in an open relationship. Which fair do’s. However Kevin just seemed very self destructive in this episode it was like he wanted him and Fangs to fail. Something is clearly going on with Kevin and the synopsis for episode 9 talked about Kevin having to face something dark from his past so I am assuming his behaviour this episode has something to do with that. My theory is that it is related to the storyline from Katy Keene with Kevin and that Director Lester Darin. Whatever it is I do think he needs to talk with Fangs about it. I was 100% on Fangs side when he pointed out that they were having a baby together and asked what about Toni. Like a child isn’t something you should mess about with if Kevin wasn’t ready then he shouldn’t have brought up having children. And that’s what’s so odd about this situation is we find out that Kevin is the one that pushed for it all, it was him that wanted to have the open relationship, it was him who wanted to get married and it was him who wanted to have a child. Also its not just Kevin and Fangs who are involved in this its Toni too, Kevin needs to get his head on straight and fast because that baby is coming and soon. Look I wasn’t entirely happy with the Kangs storyline this episode because once again it felt rushed. It again felt like it should have been drawn out over several episodes. Just in this episode we for a moment believed that Kevin was cheating, then we found out they were in an open relationship, then we found out they were getting engaged, then we found out they and Toni were all having a baby together, which you know I called that all the back when they first announced Toni was going to be pregnant post time jump, we get all this infodump in the first half of the episode then by the end of the episode Kevin and Fangs are on the rocks. A lot of people are saying that they have broken up and I’m not sure they have technically broken up, they definitely aren’t in a good place though. But again if they had just had the engagement and baby announcement in say 5x04, then revealed the whole open relationship in say 5x06 it would have felt like a much more fleshed out story and not as rushed.

4) Ok so this is one that has probably split some opinions in the fandom but I want to talk about Veronica. Now I do want to make it clear that I am not hating on Veronica here but there were some things she did this episode that I was not a fan of and again I think alot of it was just bad writing. I was not a fan at all of the way Veronica used Archie to make Chad jealous, to me that was very petty and very childish and yes I know that Chad was also behaving childish but I was kind of hoping Veronica would rise above it. I also was not a fan of the way she was flirting with Archie whilst still married to Chad, I don’t care how crappy of a person Chad is that still made me uncomfortable. But on the flip side of that like with the whole Barchie cheating storyline I am aware that people can make mistakes and get caught up in their feelings, I mean they are still only young adults, so they are still growing and learning. I think the thing that bothers me the most with Veronica or rather I should say the way they wrote Veronica is that whilst Betty and Archie clearly showed that they felt remorse and guilt for cheating Veronica did not seem to give two hoots about the fact that she was flirting with her ex behind her husband’s back. And I know people will say ‘oh but Chad’s a bad person and treats her bad.’ Ok fine then just leave him, that's not an excuse to behave that way. Also the other thing that bothered me was her attitude at the key party when she pulled Archie’s key. Now at first I thought that meant Archie would go home with them both if they followed the rules but then when I rewatched it I realised that when someone picked keys they would then retrieve their own from the bowl. After Veronica announces ‘oh look I’ve got Chad’s keys’ she then picks her own up out of the bowl. Also the fact that Kevin and Fangs both had their own keys in the bowl and yet they left with separate people. So I actually think Chad and Veronica were going to leave with separate people so it wasn’t that the three of them would be hooking up it was that Veronica was going to leave to hook up with Archie. It makes sense then that Chad would not be comfortable with this. I mean I can’t blame Chad for not wanting his wife to leave a swingers party with not just her ex but with the same guy who Veronica was deliberately using to try and make him jealous and who he has already voiced his suspicions about. The part that bothered me was when Chad first protested she said don’t be rude those are the rules, I was just like girl what are you on, she might as well have said ‘don’t be rude Chad I want to have sex with my ex and you need to be happy about it ok’ and yet a few moments later when it gets too tense for her liking and she gets Chad’s keys instead and Cheryl says that’s breaking the rules, she tells Cheryl to call her lawyer. So basically when it suits her and she wants an excuse to hook up with her ex its the rules but when it becomes an inconvenience then she’s breaking the rules and you can call her lawyer. It just did not paint Veronica in a good light at all in my opinion. But I also hated that scene when Chad confronts her asking if she just called him to humiliate and make him jealous. Firstly this tells us that Veronica called her husband and asked him to come to the party with her which really why would you do that if you are having feelings for another man and you felt like you needed time away from your husband? It makes no sense. Also she lied and then said no she wasn’t trying to make him jealous and the way she said it made it seem like she was insulted that he would even think that. Again didn’t paint Veronica in a good light. Also to be clear I am not saying that because it didn’t paint Veronica in a good light that it did paint Chad in a good light, he’s still trash but I don’t really care about him so you know whatever. And once again I was not ok with the fact that what brings her to the realisation that she needs to end her marriage was again the fact that he wasn’t ok with her hooking up with her ex at a key party. Like I am sure this isn’t how the writers meant it to come across but that’s how it did and I just feel like there were so many other ways and other things that could have brought her to that realisation then the key party. I also I was not ok with the fact that literally 5 seconds after she decides to divorce Chad she is making out with Archie. I just, no it’s too fast and it’s too rushed. I do not think it was necessary for them to kiss in that moment. Like it would have been fine if she had just said you know ,’I’m divorcing my husband,’ and then have Archie have some kind of look not even necessarily say anything and leave it there. It would have left some intrigue for next episode like ooh does this mean they are going to rekindle things, will they kiss next episode. Instead because of how close it was to her deciding to divorce her husband the scene where they reunite just felt icky to me, I mean the ink on her divorce papers isn’t even dry yet, hell scratch that it isn’t even wet yet because she only made the decision to divorce she hasn’t even filed for divorce yet so technically she’s still married. But more than all of that my biggest problem with Veronica’s storyline this episode is once again it revolves around the men in her life. Like the writers seem incapable of writing this woman as single. Even when Archie left Riverdale in season 3 which would have been the perfect opportunity to have Veronica be single for a while they matched her with Reggie. Now don’t get me wrong I loved those two together in fact out of all the people Veronica has been with her and Reggie are my favourite, I just think they worked really well together. But again it brings me to another thing that made me feel uncomfortable and that is I’m sensing this pattern with Veronica where she’ll be with someone when Archie is away and then when he comes back she’ll ditch the other person for Archie. Which would be ok if it weren’t for the fact that she always seems to do it in a way that makes it look like she doesn’t have any care for the other person’s feelings. Unfortunately this makes Veronica seem not just disloyal but kind of cold and that’s not a true testament to Veronica’s character at all. I just get so frustrated with the way they write for her sometimes. I mean there was so much that was badly written about her marriage to Chad and just this episode in general as I said before painted alot of the characters in a bad light. I just wish they would keep Veronica single for a while and write a storyline that is solely about her because there is a heck of a lot more to her character than just who she’s attracted to.

5) Ok Archie, this episode I just. To be honest I’m still too mad about it to even really talk much about it. I feel like out of everyone, the one the writers made look the worst this episode was Archie. I mean outside of who you ship, that conversation he has with Eric after Betty calls him because of her nightmare, was just well I don’t have words for what it was. It made it seem like all he cared about was sex and that he was annoyed/ didn’t care that Betty was upset. This is not our Archie Andrews, in no world would he be that cold about Betty upset he has always been there for her. It wasn’t just insulting to Barchie it was insulting to Archie’s character and who he is at his core which is someone who always cares about his friends above all else.

6) Cheryl is once again going about everything the wrong way. I could understand her being a little upset at the fact that Toni is making this big happy non traditional family for herself because she probably thought that one day it would be her and Toni having the baby and so this might make her feel left out. I mean she was genuinely happy for Kangs when they announced their engagement. So its not like she doesn’t want anyone to be happy when she’s not. I also feel like given that Toni came to see her twice during the time jump which we learn when her and Archie are catching up in 5x04 that maybe originally she was hoping to include Cheryl in the whole baby thing and raise the baby all four of them together. A part of me still hopes that might happen but I feel like there needs to be alot of growing and healing for all four of the characters first. However unfortunately Cheryl’s jealousy at the situation leads to her being too manipulative and she arranges the key party so that she can show Toni how ‘fragile some unions can be’ and makes her the creepiest nursery in the world hoping that they can all hole up in Thorn Hill together. I am glad that Toni called Cheryl out on her manipulation I do think Cheryl needed that. Also as a side note I was expecting some explanation as to why Toni won’t be appearing in the next few episodes but at first I thought we didn’t. But then again on the rewatch I realised they kind of did. When Cheryl comes barging in after the baby announcement Toni tells her that she wants to take a step back from the Vixens. But then Cheryl interrupts her. I think the writers were expecting us to put the rest together ourselves which is Toni now that she’s nearing the end of her pregnancy she is likely going to be staying at home more and resting up.

7) I am ok with the kiss between Cheryl and Minerva. My hope is that Minerva is not going to manipulate her in some way and that this relationship will give Cheryl something that will make her a better person so that when she is ready to go back to Toni she has learnt something if that makes sense.

8) Ok so I want to talk about some positives because at this point it feels more like a rant than anything else and there were some things I liked in this episode. Obviously as a Barchie shipper I thought the firefighter scene in the beginning of the scene was really sweet and it was very aesthetically pleasing with all the candles and everything, it was just a well shot scene.

9) I am very intrigued by Jughead’s blackouts and trauma that he experienced in New York. I do have a theory that the visions he is seeing of the mothman and how twice they are shown as a reflection is suppose to be because he is seeing the mothman/ this monster in himself. I really do think that Jughead killed someone while blacked out and subconsciously he remembers it but he’s so traumatised by it he’s keeping it repressed. Now whether he killed someone accidently, or whether it was self defence or the drugs just made him lose it on someone I’m not sure but I am convinced that he is responsible for someone death somehow.

10) As always I loved Jughead and Tabitha’s interaction this episode. Tabitha is an absolute angel and such a supportive friend. The way she went to the support group with him and got him to open up to her. How she took care of him after the key party. She’s clearly come to care about him a lot and its nice to see someone supporting Jughead.

Ok and that’s it for this episode. I don’t have any theories for next episode but I’ve also kind have lost any enthusiasm I had for the show which is frustrating because up until this episode I was really enjoying this season but this episode was so bad its literally knocked the wind right out of me.

#riverdale #riverdale spoilers

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